


Sacred Vow

by Anonymous



Series: Slave Galen [2]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Crying, M/M, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Past Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Sexual Abuse, Past Torture, Rape Recovery, Recovery
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-08
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2018-10-29 12:10:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 23,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10853739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Follows Galen's path to recovery from Cassian's point of view.





	Sacred Vow

When Cassian first hears about Galen when he's only been in the alliance for a couple of years. He's standing in a canteen, in the queue, behind two men, who are talking animatedly.

  
“He killed his wife and his daughter, you know.”

  
“Oh, yeah, everybody knows that, and just went straight back to the Empire.”

  
“Well, he used to fuck that Krennic guy, back when they they were both at school.”

  
“Oh, my-, that just...Really? Why?”

  
They move off before Cassian can ask them who and what they are talking about, but he doesn't forget the conversation. He lost his family due to the Empire. He can hardly believe that there is someone who would betray their flesh and blood, he feels fury and resentment towards this unnamed man. He hates him.

  
It's a few years later when he gets to put a name to the idea he's been presented.

He's in a meeting, on his best behaviour as a gangly teen, he wants to be thought of as an adult and not looked at as a child.

  
“What about Erso?” A woman a few seats down from Draven asks.

  
Immediately faces around the table darken, and lips curl contemptuously.

  
“What about him?” Draven sounds so bored and dismissive.

  
“Well, he's aiding the Empire, isn't he?”

  
“Erso made his choices, his wife died because of it, he is now cooperating with the enemy. He is a traitor to the rebel alliance.

  
For a moment Cassian's eyes burn with angry tears, but he forces them away. He doesn't want to cry in front of the others, he wishes he didn't take this personally but he can't help it. He lost his family against his will and it rankles that someone would dispose of theirs on purpose.

  
When he's 19 he hears about Erso again, he's meeting another spy, just back from a mission. The older man has been out gathering Intel. Cassian is on the edge of the small group welcoming the man safely home.

  
“Daniel, so good to see you safe!”

  
“Was a long trip, let me tell you!”

  
“Any news?”

  
“Erso is working on a superweapon. Well, whenever he's not entertaining the rest of the Imperial staff!”

  
Cassian blinks, missing the implications, wonderingw hetherthis Erso is a stand up comedian or a jester.

“He's what?”

  
Cassian realises his error at the gasped, pronouncement.

  
“Yeah, I met with Nari, and he was telling me everything. Apparently all the bored and the lonely head down to Erso who is only too happy to head down on them, if you follow my drift.”

  
“Ewww.” Several voices utter their disgust and Cassian finally catches up on the uptake, and feels himself grimace at the news too.

  
“Urgh, and you had to talk to Nari too. Sounds like an awful trip.”

  
“Yeah, but he's the chattiest Imperial we know of, so?” Daniel shrugs. 

Thereare murmurs of agreement from around the room.

  
When he's 23 a picture is passed around the base. It's not given to him, half the men still think of him as a child much to his dismay, by he finds it left, abandoned, on a table in the canteen.

  
It's an old school photograph, a simple picture, it's marked and creased from being passed around. It's of a man, kneeling, there is release coating his face, just dripping down one of his prominent cheekbones. With the angle of his face and his hair, it's hard to see the man facial expression but his hands are in front of him. Although the picture cuts off to high to see, his hands are clearly at his groin.

Cassian feels a frisson of excitement, as he concludes that the man's hands must be wrapped around his dick, or cradling his balls. From what he can see of the man he's handsome.

  
Cassian feels terror sweep through him as he realises that he's thinking about another man's cock. He's not gay. He doesn't have a problem with it, but he's not gay. He's not. He slaps the photo down on the table and storms out of the canteen.

  
When he's ordered to kill Erso he feels nothing, not pleasure at getting one over on the Empire's whore, nor regret at what he's about to do. He can feel Jyn’s eyes on him as he packs away his blaster and leaves with Bodhi in tow.

  
He looks down the sights at Erso, and sees a slim man, dressed in a smart High Ranking Uniform, it's clearly not his and for a moment he smirks and wonders whose floor Erso grabbed it off.

  
Then he sees Jyn climbing up the side and has to adapt his plans on the move.

  
The battle is brief, short lived but bloody. He grabs the traitor as he falls, blood flowing from a wound the man has sustained during the fight.

Erso struggles and calls out in a language that he doesn't recognise. He digs his fingers into the man's arms a little more viciously than he should, but he reasons there is no need to coddle a traitor.

Erso is lighter than he looks under all his clothing.   
He still manages to put up a hell of a struggle, he's frantic, clawing and screaming. Cassian overpowers him without too much of a fuss and drags him to the med bay. A young man appears and together they haul the semi conscious man onto the bed.

“”Erso.” He demands tapping the man's face trying to get him to calm down. It fails spectacularly as all Erso does is flinch and fight harder to free himself.

“If he won't calm down apply the restraints. I need to see what I'm dealing with.” The young medic pants, his eyes wide and scared. He probably still believes the tales of Imperials eating babies, Cassian thinks. Wondering when Medical staff all became so  _ young. _

Cassian grabs one of Ersos wrists and holds it firmly to the bed so the young Medic can strap a cuff around it. At the click around the surprisingly boney appendage, Erso goes still. He sobs once and turns his face away but not before Cassian can see the dampness of tears on his cheeks.

  
It takes him another three hours tracking down the other rebels, and when he eventually locates them, he finds Chirrut bloody and unconscious. Baze is beside himself, and they gather Chirrut up and get him back ship board as quickly as they can.

  
“Wait, I'll find somewhere.” The young girl acting as a ward clerk says. She barely looks old enough to have left school. “We will have to move one of the walking wounded out of the Med Bay in order to treat Mr.. erm?” She gestures at Chirrut.

“Who is alright to leave? Who shall I move?”

The girl looks through the list, thumbing her top lip anxiously. “The traitor? What's his name? Erso? He's not too bad now. Stable.”

“I'll move him.” Cassian says grimly. Anxiety for Chirrut is thrumming through him. He steps through into the Med bay, seeking the bed where he left the Imperial.

He finds the bed and sees Erso huddled, as much as a man his size can.

“Get up,” he orders. To his annoyance Erso lies absolutely still, does the man speak standard? “Get up.” He repeatsreaching for the nearest restrain and tugging it free. His movements are hasty, his though mainly on Chirrut.

Erso is uncooperative and slow, when he climbs out of bed Cassian feels a wave of embarrassment as the other man is nude. Angry, as his own embarrassment  makes him feel stupid he roughly slaps the cuffs onto Erso’s wrists. He feels better when he has the situation under control again. The Imperial safely restrained and Chirrut receiving  medical attention. 

He leads them down to the cells and locks Erso inside. The man is uncooperative when he tries to remove the restraints and for a moment he's tempted to leave them in place overnight. Reminding himself that they are supposed to be the better people. He removes them then leaves before Erso’s presence can inspire any more pettiness in him.

  
It's another five hours before he can get to bed himself. He goes to check on Chirrut, then there is an essential update from Draven. 

It's nearly half past five in the morning and he hasn't slept in more than 40 hours when Kay sends him off to bed, as though he's a toddler. He means to shower when he gets back to his borrowed room but in the end he simply strips off his borrowed boots and collapses backwards onto the narrow bed. He doesn't even bother burrowing under the sheets simply lies flat and nods off. He wakes when it's nearly lunchtime, considers how much work there is to do today, nearly groans and burrows back into the bed. Instead he pulls himself towards the shower, the finds some clothes that might be clean and roughly fit, before going in search of Caff.

After the third cup, and reading through the messages that are stored in his inbox, he goes off to deal with the prisoners. Krennic is a spitting ball of fury and hate, Cassian tries to get him to talk for a few minutes but he knows deep down that it's pointless.

  
He keys the code into the door where he left Erso and when the door slides open he's suddenly afraid when the room his empty. 

He swears and yells over his shoulder to the bored guard who's standing, not quite to attention in the corridor, for help.

There is a dull  thud, and he drops to his knees and peaks under the bed.

Erso.

“What are you doing?” he asks in disbelief. Under the bed, Erso is curled up into a tiny ball, his hands over his face. “Get out,” Cassian coaxes, trying to keep the irritation out of his voice, “come on.” He reaches out and tries to gently tug Erso out, wondering how on earth the other man has folded himself into such a small space. And why he would bother.

He gently eases Erso out from under the bed. The older man is trembling violently and under the bright lights Cassian can see faint lines across his back. Unthinkingly he reaches out to touch one and Erso recoils before immediately stilling into a terrible frozen stillness. The man doesn't even breathe for a long moment.

“What were you doing under there?” He asks trying to keep his voice gentle. He can hear in his own voice he hasn't managed it, but he feels completely thrown by what's happened. Struggling to work out what's going on.

“Master..Master, I… I'm sorry, I didn't- I don't understand.. I,” Erso is sputtering at his feet. He won't stand just kneels on the floor and Cassian tries to calm the clearly distraught man.

“Master? Why.. don't call me that. What are you doing? Why didn't you even bother to get dressed?” his voice gets a bit shrill when he actually looks at Erso and realises how thin the man is out of his ridiculous Imperial uniform. The man is absolutely skeletal, it's not the slimness of a man who is naturally thin, he's emaciated. At best he has an eating disorder at worst he has been deliberately starved.

At his feet Erso takes his question as a criticism, he sees it in the way the other man tucks his head lower and raises his shoulders as though preparing to take a blow. He's shivering too.

“Master, clothes? I didn't know. I'm sorry Master. Please.”

Erso is crying now, tears are sliding down his face and Cassian has never felt so helplessly out of his depth as he does now. What an earth is he supposed to do with a crying Imperial. Out of everything he expected today, a weeping man hunched before him clearly expecting to be hurt wasn't it.

“You didn't know you were supposed to wear clothes? There are some on your bed, you couldn't figure that out?” he tries for practicalities, to put them both back onto firmer ground. He can try to sort out what's going on once he has Erso dressed at least. And fed. The man needs a meal.

At his feet, Erso cranes to look at the pile of clothing resting in a neat pile on the bed covers.

“Mast-”

Cassian cuts him off, anger rising as he realises that this is a learned response.  _ What is going on?  _ “Don't.call.me.that.” he demands. He knows the next second it came out too clipped. Too angry.

Erso freaks out at his feet.  He could have coped if Erso had screamed or started throwing things. Instead he stops breathing again, closed his eyes and holds himself completely still.

“Hey, hey, come on, don't.” Cassian begs, reaching out for the naked man at his feet. Erso gasps in a breath and Cassian has a second of thinking maybe he's fixed things. The slight hope he'd had dies quickly as Erso folds into a weird bow at his feet. He's standing there gawking as Erso presses his face into the floor between Cassian's feet. The scars on his back as silvery against his pale skin in the harsh light of the cell. Erso’s trembling becomes, if possible, even more evident and he reaches out to touch the distressed man. Driven to try and soothe him. At his touch the man at his feet curls away from him slightly, before going still and returning to the horrible stillness. It's the stillness of a beaten dog trying to hide in plain sight. 

“Erso? Erso? Come on. Try to breathe. Come on.” Nothing he says makes any difference and he hovers for a moment before beckoning the still watching guard.

“Keep an eye on him. If he get any worse call the Med Bay.” He leaves the guard without waiting for a response and goes in search of Bodhi. Hoping that the other man will have answers.

“I messed up.” He blurts.

“Huh? Wha-”

“It's Erso. He's having a fit or something. Can you come?”

“I told you. I told you he was on your side. Why did you-”

“Can you tell me off later? I'm at the end of my rope and the end piece is very slippery.” He cuts Bodhi off.

Bodhi’s eyes narrow, but he comes along readily enough. Bodhi had told him, repeatedly, that Erso was in trouble and he hadn't listened. Had considered Bodhi too naïve to see the truth. Now he has to acknowledge that the one blinded by their prejudices might be him.

“What happened?” Bodhi asks as they draw up to the cell block.

“He was hiding under the bed, I tried to get him to get dressed and I, sort of, maybe, shouted at him, just a bit, I didn't mean to, then he just stopped and-” they round the corner and he sees that Erso is a little calmer, although the guard looks as poleaxed as he feels.  “ahh, hey come on, you're ok, get up, get up-”

“Shhhh, Cassian! You'll set his collar off.” Bodhi hisses and digs him in the ribs.

“Collar? Wha- That thing? What does it have to do-” he tries to ask as his eyes fall on the dark metal band at Erso’s neck. He'd seen it last night and had though it jewellery. He's been around so many different cultures that he seems to be just accepting things now. It's stupid dangerous, behaviour in a spy.   
“Leave it, I'll tell you later just go. Ok, let me sort this, go get some food sorted out, we'll be along in a few minutes, ok?” Bodhi shoves at him gently, and he motions to the guard and they both step out.

“Should we leave him with the prisoner, sir?” The guard asks.

“Let them be. If they don't come out in twenty minutes call me back, alright?”

At the guards nod, he heads down to the canteen shaken. At the last possible second he detours to find Kay. “Tell Jyn to take her meal in the Officers mess. Get her to avoid the staff canteen.” He says expecting disagreement from Kay. To his surprise Kay goes willingly. It is almost frightening to think that even Kay had managed to realise that Erso is in such bad shape they shouldn't let his daughter see. Normally that is the type of thing that would completely pass him by.

He finds Baze and Chirrut in the canteen. “Grab an empty table.” He calls. “Big enough for six. Erso, the imperial might be joining us.”

“He is going to need our help.” Chirrut says blandly, in that way that could be a statement or a question. Cassian grunts by way of answer and drags out a chair and drops into it then tugs out another for Chirrut.

“Feeling better?” He asks instead.

“Much.” 

He hums in his throat by way of response, but deep down he's greatly relieved. Across the canteen he sees the flash of tawny skin and dark hair that is Bodhi. As Bodhi approaches, with Erso in tow, dressed thank the stars, he can see how tense Erso is. The man's eyes are flickering left and right and he looks ready to bolt. Or faint.

“This is Kay, Baze and Chirrut.” He says, by way of introduction, hoping it will set Erso more at ease. “Sit, sit.” 

At his words, order his mind supplies, as Erso slides onto his knees. Almost gracefully besides his chair.

Across the table Baze makes a sound as though the air has been punched out of him.

Erso looks up, and Cassian is dismayed to see the dread in the man’s brown eyes.

“No, no.” he says, trying to reassure.

Erso visibly winces, clearly biting back more obvious signs of pain.  _ The collar. _ His mind supplies helpfully.

“It's fine Galen. Cassian you need to be careful you're setting his collar off again, it hurts him. Galen can you sit in one of the chairs?” Thankfully, Bodhi steps in.

“Yeah, in one of the chairs please there's no need- I mean if that's what you prefer, but it will be better - easier if you just-”

Baze drags a chair out and gestures at it. Mercifully cutting of his rambling.

Erso slides gingerly into the nearest chair, perching on the very edge as though he expects the chair to evict him at a moment's notice.

“Good, yeah, well done.” he soothes, in case the collar requires positive feedback. He's going to need to get it off Erso as soon as possible. Or at least find out how it works properly. Prevent anyone from inadvertently setting it off and injuring Erso.

Still, first things first. “Let's get some food then.” He hopes that a meal will relax Erso. Will go some way to persuading him that they mean him no harm. Hoping that both food and less scrutiny will put the other man at ease. He heads off and grabs a tray and gathers the nearest bowls of food that looks plain and easy to eat. As he heads back to the table he mentally plans the rest of the day, he needs to take Galen to the med bay, get the collar removed. Update Draven about what's happened and he needs to talk to Jyn, to put her at ease. He feels exhausted about the sheer amount of stuff he needs to do. He gets back to the tables and begins to dole out bowls. He places one carefully in front of a Galen, who looks down at the bowl and then back up at Cassian. His eyes are huge and he looks worried. Cassian feels his stomach clench worriedly.

“Is this?” Galen asks, hesitantly, he points at the bowl then very slowly back at his own chest.   
“Yes?” Cassian replies, feeling desperately uncertain, “do you not like it.” He hopes that's Galen's worry, but knows in his heart that Galen expects to be denied food.  _ Or worse _ , a little voice chimes in his head,  _ made to perform for it. _

Erso babbles anxiously, before going still and staring at the bowl, desperate hope is written across his thin features.  _ He needs a shave _ , Cassian realises.

“What do i have to do?” Galen asks, his voice is tight with dread, but his face is eerily blank.

“Eat it.” He replies, aiming to keep his voice steady, trying to project calm. He can see from the pinched look on Chirrut face that the other man has caught onto the deeper meaning of the question. Or a possible meaning at least, he corrects himself. It's just possible Galen is worried about being forced back into making weaponry. Rather than more personal forms of slavery. Sighing he turns to his own meal making a mental note to update Galen's files. 

“What did you do to him yesterday, Cassian?” Baze asks, dragging him from his thoughts.

“Nothing!” He denies at once, thoughts still on the exact nature of Galen's captivity. “What do you think I did?”

“Nothing is what i was afraid of! Please tell me you at least got him a meal? Did he? Did you? You fed him? You didn't just have him locked away without feeding him?” Baze demands, across the table Galen flinches.   
“I...erm.. Look things were very busy last night, i had to prioritise.” He tries to soothe the situation, he can see just how tense Galen's shoulders are becoming and tries to signal subtly to Baze that they can have this conversation later. In private.

“So you just left him?” Either Baze doesn't pick up on his hints of he's too angry to let it go.   
“As far as we know he was working with the Empire, Baze. I didn't have infinite time to deal with rogue Imperials just after we've been attacked, there was a lot to do last night.” He snaps back, touchy because he knows that Base is right. He behaved badly last night. No matter what Erso may or may not have done, he should not have left the man naked and afraid without seeing to his basic needs. Guilt coils tighter in his belly. He doubts he's the first man to ignore even the most basic of Galen's needs and head to bed without bothering to feed, water or clothe him.

“I get that we were busy, but really, Cassian, I don't think he should just have been left. Or even left the Med bay.”   
“We needed the space I moved the least injured person, this had nothing to do with his allegiances.” Across the table, Galen flinches again, curls into himself harder and Cassian starts to reach out to the older man. Wanting to ease the sting of his words.

“Nothing?” Baze presses.   
“YES! It had-” he snaps again, goaded beyond endurance, wanting to end the conversation quickly. Galen looks decidedly-

Galen vomits copiously, all across the floor. The whole room goes quiet and every set of eyes falls on them.

M’ sorry Master,” Galen mumbles, he sounds absolutely exhausted, “Sir,” he corrects himself quickly. “I'm so sorry, sir. I'll clean it. I'll clean it up if you just tell me wher-

“Shhhh,” Baze soothes, and Galen goes silent at once. Talking the gentling as an order. Distantly Cassian reminds himself to make all future responses to Galen suggestions. So the other man can refuse if he want to. Perhaps, if he feels comfortable to do so. Maybe.

“It's alright, accidents happen. Not your fault, happens to the best of us. Right, Cassian.” Bohdi glares at him, while he tries to move Chirrut out of the way. He glares back.

“Right,” he says, nodding, “right, yeah, that's right.”   
“Yes, sir.” Galen murmurs, and he sounds so hopeless that Cassian wishes there was some way to comfort him. He racking his brain to think of anything to say that might put Galen at ease when Kay pipes up.

“Baze is right, this isn't your fault.” the droid states, with the ease of a body telling the truth. “If blame is to be assigned it would have to be assigned properly and 87.35% would be attributed to you, Cassian.”

“Me?” he says, feeling even guiltier and angry that he has managed so badly. He normally does better than this.

“Yes, feeding an underweight individual shortly after a period of significant stress is very likely to produce digestive distress, given that the stress was due to your handling of-”   
“Alright, Kay, thanks. That's helpful. You could have told me the odds of that happening if they were so high!”   
“Now you want to know the odds? That makes a change.” Kay sasses straight back.   
Sighing and shaking his head Cassian turns away from the droid. “How are you, do you still feel sick? Would you like a glass of water?”   
“I..?” Galen stammers, his eyes are glassy and he is shaking again.

“One question at a time Cassian. Go easy.” Chirrut tells him, placing a restraining hand on his sleeve. “ Go easy on him, you've had a tough time haven't you. Go on, Cassian, go and get him some water.”

Relieved to shirk responsibility for a few moments, he goes gratefully. He takes a moment to get a grip on his emotions as he get the water. Tried to calm down so he can be the calm presence that is required, then he returns and sets the water down on the table in front of Galen.

“I think, Galen, that we should go down to engineering.” he says over the sound of Chirrut fussily instructing Galen on how to drink his water. It makes him uneasy. On the one hand, orders seem to calm Galen. He looks for them to know he's doing the right, on the other it's demeaning to be ordering him about. But on yet another hand, telling a panicked person to drink slowly isn't unusual? He grits his teeth at the conflict he feels. 

At his words, as innocuous as they had seemed, Galen flinches and catches something on the table leg. It hits with a solid sounding thump. Cassian winces along, then promptly looks to the others for help as Galen begins to cry again. 

It's not even loud sobs, that would be bad but somehow the slow trickle of silent tears is worse. He can't help wondering how often Galen's tears were completely overlooked for him to have learned to cry in silence. Without any hope of comfort or swaying his abusers from their actions. 

“What? What's wrong? Galen? Why is he crying?” He asks Bodhi, hoping that the other man's will have some answers.   
“What did you say to him?” Bodhi demands, and Cassian makes a mental note to talk to everyone about keeping their voices at a natural volume when he sees Galen flinch and close his eyes in response to the angry tone. Clearly unable to differentiate the direction of the anger.   
“I.. I just said- engineering.” He says, forcing himself to keep his voice level, even and gentle. “That collar needs to come off. He can't go around like that forever you know.”

“Galen?” Bodhi crouches in front of Galen, settling a hand just above his knee, hovering in the air above it. “ Try to calm down, breathe, breathe with me, yeah? In- and out. Yeah, that's good, keep going. In- and out.”

“Galen,” Cassian gentle nudges Bodhi aside a little, kicking himself for not using this posture before now. Lower and less threatening that looming over Galen. It takes Galen a few moments to look at him. Thankfully he looks more confused now than frightened. “Did the engineering department frighten you?”  _ Sure, Andor. Frightened.  _ He thinks to himself.  _ Guys, is terrified. And I don't know why. _ He resolves to look through all the files and pull up all the data on Erso as soon as he can to try and avoid the pitfalls. Or at least to try and map the minefield.

“Yes, Mas- sir.”   
“Cassian, my name is Cassian. There is nothing scary there, honest, I just want to get your collar off, Bodhi says it hurts you? We've got a guy called Noris down there, he'll be able to take a look at it. See if we can't get it off, ok?”   
“Yes, sir.”

“Can you come now? Or do you want to wait for a few minutes?” He knows that Galen is saying what he thinks that Cassian wants to hear rather than what he wants. He figured that the least they can do is get the trip over with, hopefully allay some of Galen's fears.

“Now, sir.” Galen mumbles, head tucked down and shoulders hunched. Defensive and small. 

“Come on, let's go now then.” He says climbing to his feet and offering a hand to pull Galen to his feet. “Noris will be there but the department will be quiet, most people are at lunch right now.” He is surprised by how tall Galen is the man manages to look tiny, he huddles into himself like he's trying to break the laws of physics and disappear inside himself to hide. 

He leads Galen away and heads down towards engineering, thanking every deity he's ever heard of the Noris is here. He's a bit rough around the edges but he's great with kids and is always the one all the agents gravitate towards after a bad mission.

“Noris? You here?” He asks once they've arrived.   
“Eh, Andor? What do you want?”   
“My friend here has an Imperial torture device on him and we need it off?” 

He almost chuckles as Noris blinks bewilderedly a t them both. For a moment he thinks Noris is going to ask 'torture device?’ with all the credulity it deserves. But he can tell the exact moment Noris sees Galen as the other man’s face creases into sympathetic lines.

“A torture device?” Noris confirms with grim resignation.

“Yeah, a collar.”

Noris’ eyes fix on the dark band around Galen’s neck and he nods,“Let's have a look then.”

Noris' holds his hand out and tries to introduce himself, Galen looks at his outstretched hand blankly. Cassian wonders if he should step in and smooth things over but to his relief Norris merely continues as though it hadn't happened.

“You alright, son? You don't look so well. Come and sit down.”

It's a relief to let someone else handle the situation so he stands back and allows Norris to soothe Galen.

“Can I touch it?”   
“Yes, sir.”

He watches, Galen is clearly very tense but he doesn't object to Norris’s gentle handling. After a moment it occurs to him that that might be because Galen is too afraid to protest. He wishes there was something he could do to comfort Galen, but if he touches the older man he thinks he'll make the situation worse.

“Nasty bit of kit that,” Norris sucks his lips against his teeth with a squeaking sound. “Very nasty. Been on for a long time?” After he'd looked at the collar for several minutes, while Galen had turned paler and paler as the seconds had gone by.

“About fifteen years, I'm not sure exactly, sir, sorry.”

“Don't be sorry, lad. Don't be sorry. Let's concentrate on getting that off.” He wanders off still muttering, shaking his head to himself as he goes.

Cassian hops up onto the workbench perching on it, swinging his legs a little. “I'm sorry I left you like that last night, there was a lot to do, things were pretty manic but I shouldn't have just dumped you in a cell like that. I'm sorry.”

“S’alright, sir.” Galen mumbles rubbing one of his hands up and down his legs, anxious or cold, Cassian can’t quite be sure.

Sighing deeply, he reaches out meaning to offer some comfort but pulls back when Galen twitches, clearly frightened. His eyes huge in his thin face. “It's not really, not at all but thank you anyway.” Cassian tells him, balling his own hands together in his lap in an effort to suppress the urge to reach out to Galen to offer physical reassurance. Knowing that the other man will flinch away and will become more frightened by having ‘broken the rules’. Cassian hates the Empire a little more with every flinch of the emaciated body in front of him. And to think he'd thought just this morning that he'd already reached his limits of hatred towards the Empire.

“Get down, you don't know what's been on these benches and now it's on your clothes.” Norris says from behind them, causing them both to jump. “What's not alright?”

“I didn't handle yesterday very well.” Cassian admits, grateful for the opportunity to admit it freely, hoping, selfishly for absolution.

“Hmmm,” Norris’ eyebrows come down so far they nearly obscure his eyes while he looks at Cassian, “ you always could be hasty. I remember when you were only this high,” he gestures at about the height of the workbench, “always trying to head off with the fighter pilots. We had to drag him out of a fighter about once a week, you know.” Norris says to Galen, who nods without looking at either of them,  and Norris huffs a laugh. “ Strong and silent type. That's you, lad. Alright, I'm going to hook this up to your collar, has it ever had maintenance?” At the shake of Galen's bowed head, he continues. “No? I didn't think so, looks like precious little care was taken over you, son. You know the more I hear about these Imperials the less I like.” He grins at Cassian who grins back in the face of this old, old joke.

“So, that's that, it should prevent the collar from firing when I disable it, if you feel anything tell me at once, you got that? I mean it, you feel anything, you tell me! Good. In three, one, two-”

Cassian watches keenly, aware that Galen has stopped breathing and subconsciously holding his own breath in sympathy with the older man.

“That alright? Good, that's good. Now what to use to get this off? How did they get it on? Ahh, no wait I've found it, a lock! You've still got that droid? He'll be able to override this quicker than I can.”

Obediently, he drops down off the table and wanders a few paces away to comm Kay. He can tell the droid has been expecting his when he answers immediately. “Kay, can you come by and override a lock on the collar?”

“Well, I can not say for certainty without having seen the device in question, but i would assume that it will be simple enough.”

“Thanks, Kay.” he says dryly.

Kay cuts the line without any further response and Cassian knows he'll be on his way. He heads back towards the other where he can see Norris gamley trying to drag Galen into conversation. 

“- been back with us? Noris asks.

“24 hours, I think.” Galen whispers back, Cassian can see his eyes darting around the room from under his thick bangs. 

“Ahh, so not long,” Norris says. And there is an awkward silence as everyone tries to think of something to say. Cassian tries, as he has been all morning, to find something to say that could be helpful and might aid in calming Galen.

To his relief Kay appears very quickly and Norris is quick to get straight to the point. “Can you override this?” he asks, gesturing at the device around Galen’s neck. Kaytoo leans over and the whole room tries to ignore the barely suppressed flinch that the motion provokes. Cassian is filled with gratitude that Norris is so on the ball, he doubts that mentioning his very obvious discomfort will help alleviate Galen’s anxiety.

“with only 2.67 billion settings anyone could override this given enough time.”

“Kay,” Cassian says, fond and exasperated. “ Can you do it before the sun burns out?”

“Statistically not before one of them does, but definitely before the closest one will. I'm not sure that such a time frame will bring much comfort to Galen, most carbon based life forms don't have comparable life spans to stars.” Kay replies, breezily, and Cassian wishes he was close enough to give him a nudge to shut him up.

“Please can you just overrode that lock?” Noris asks, “today, please, some of us still have work that needs doing.” Galen stirs a little, and Cassian can see him fidget worriedly, but Norris continues without pausing, “And this is important, lad’s been wearing that thing,” his tone is of deep disgust, “for far far too long.”

Kay steps up without any further comment and there is a few moments of whirring and clicking, then there is a much louder click and the collar comes away in Kay’s hands. Leaving behind a reddened ring of irritated flesh around Galen’s neck. 

Galen goes a pale shade of greenish grey and sways, slipping forwards. Cassian dives to prevent him from hitting his head on the edge of the workbench at the same time as Norris. He gets a handful of Galen’s shirt and it's enough to slow his descent and direct him away from the workbench and avoid injury. Galen flinches hard at the feeling of hands on him, and Norris let's go as though he's been burnt. 

Cassian keeps a hold of the other man, rubs soothingly at his shoulders, now he's made contact he tries to make the most of the situation and tries to look at the mark on Galen's neck, to see if he's dehydrated from the spring in the skin and to measure the amount of subcutaneous fat in his shoulders. Mentally files away all the information to update the Med Bay. All the while he murmurs under his breath, the same kind of useless platitudes that he gets told after rough missions. 

A loud clang, seems to drag Galen into awareness, and he raises a hand to touch at his neck. Watching him he wonders if Galen had had the collar on permanently all the time that he'd been a slave. If this is the first time he's been without it since he was taken. No wonder he looks so shocked.

”Are you ok to stand?” He asks. “ Let's get you to the med bay, get that wound dressed.” He feels Galen tense under his hands.“Or we can do that tomorrow, you need a full check up, get it all done at once? One visit? Would you prefer that?” Galen doesn’t nod, but the muscles under his hands relax a little at the reprieve. “Ok, well let me dress this upstairs then? Good, well, ok then. Kay? Can you tell the others we are coming back up? And get the first aid kit? Meet us in rec room 4? Great!” Kay heads off without a word.

“Take it easy lad, you need some rest.” Norris says, he looks worried and glances meaningfully at Cassian.  _ Later.  _ Cassian mouths back

“Thank you.” Galen says, his voice is a bit strangled, and Cassian runs a hand across his bicep in an attempt to soothe. Galen makes a, clearly involuntary twitch, so he lets his hands drop and steps back a little. Letting him have his space.

“Welcome, son. Welcome. Now go lie down before you fall down again, you're dead on your feet.” Noris rubs at his bicep then let's go and walks away. He waves once then disappears into his office at the back of the shop. Cassian can tell from the set of his shoulders that Norris is upset and reminds himself to check on him later. At this rate he's going to need to check in with the whole crew.

“Come on.” He says offering Galen a hand and leading him off to rec room 4, he takes care to walk at Galen’s pace. Conscious of the fact that the older man is clearly weak and in pain. And had nearly passed out only a few minutes beforehand. 

Thankfully when they get to the rec room, Baze has beaten them there and he’s brought a first aid kit with him. He is spreading the contents out across the seat of one of the old sofas, checking through the supplies.

“Can you sit there?” Baze asks, and Cassian wants to hug him, for making it so clearly a question.

“Yes, sir.” Galen replies, and he sounds so helpless and exhausted, that Cassian feels his own disappointment like a physical blow. The sick feeling doesn't dissipate as Galen sits precisely where Baze had directed him and sits absolutely still as Baze gets to work.

From where he's standing Cassian can see the wound clearly and while not deep it looks raw and angry, Baze is clearly practiced and gentle as he cleans the injury site and tapes a ring of dressings over the injury. It looks as though Galen has swapped one collar for another and Cassian has to look away for a moment, strangely distressed by the visual.

“That's you done.” Baze says smoothing a last piece of medical tape down. “ You look like you need a nap.” It's true, Cassian thinks, Galen is nearly nodding off.

“I'm fine, I'm alright, sir. What do you need me to do?” Galen says, to Cassian’s disappointment he starts to sit up and rub his face trying to wake himself up.

“Try to eat again.” Chirrut prompts into the sudden silence, “you need some nourishment. A smaller bowl of soup this time, take it slowly, no one will take it.” Cassian nods as well, and motions to Bodhi to go and get him something, while he goes of to the Med bay for a sick bowl, just in case. “No one will take it from you, it's yours, I promise.”

“In case you get sick again,” he says once he returns and he hands it over, “bathrooms there, but if you don't make it you've got this. Don't worry either way. It's not hard to clear up, whatever happens. Even if you puke on the carpet it's not the end of the world, but still take this, just in case.”

Behind him he hears Bodhi return. “Here.” He holds a small bowl of soup out and Galen takes it.

It's evident almost at once that Galen is not going to keep the meal down, but it's still hugely disappointing when he hears the other man throwing up. He dithers about talking him straight to the Med Bay despite Galen’s obvious reluctance.

“I said i would take him tomorrow,” he murmurs to Baze. “Perhaps I should take him tonight.”

“I’d leave it,” Baze whispers back, “it's only a few hours at this point. I know he's thin, but I think that he'll make it through the night. He's up and moving, he's not moribund Cassian.”

Bodhi offers Galen a glass of water once he returns and works on encouraging him to take a sip. Watching them Cassian realises that Galen responds to Bodhi in much the same way as he does to them, and he swallows back further disappointment.

“Bed time?” He asks Galen, the other man looks absolutely exhausted.Between his prominent cheekbones and the shadows under his eyes he looks like a skull in the half light. “Yeah, bedtime, come on, let's get you settled.”

“Yes, master.” 

“Cassian, it's Cassian, no, no, oh, please don't get upset.” He corrects gently, he knows that he shouldn’t, at this point it's not worth upsetting Galen, but he genuinely can’t stand hearing the Empire’s words coming out of the other man's mouth. He really can’t stomach hearing them aimed at him.

“Sorry, Cassian.” Galen murmurs, and there is such miserable dread in his eyes that Cassian feels guilty.

“Don't be,” he reassures, “it's been a long day, you're tired. Let's get you into bed, things will seem better in the morning.”

He leads Galen through the corridors to the rooms where the rest of them are currently rooming, and finds the empty one. Thankfully it's only one door away from his, he can keep an eye on Galen. He opens the door and ushers Galen inside, the older man goes obediently but he is trembling. The though of exactly what could be frightening Galen is making him feel sick. He struggles to think of a way to ask Galen if they abused him, without frightening him further or without making Galen think that he is angling for favours.

Trying to be as calm as possible he opens the fresher door and turns the shower on to heat.

He gestures between the shower and Galen to give the older man a hint and feels his heart sink when Galen looks at him with wide eyed incredulity, asking, “me?” 

“Yes?” He replies unable to stop himself from asking the question in return. Leaving Galen in the bathroom he goes to dig some clean clothes out of the drawers. They will be a little too short but as Galen is so thin then will hang lower on him so it should do for a few days until they can find him something better. He tosses them to Galen who nearly doesn't catch them. Cassian feels another frisson of worry as he can't tell whether the delay is surprise or if it's some kind of symptom of Galen's neglect.

Ok, go get showered and changed. I'll be back in a few minutes.” he makes sure to smile as reassuringly as he can, before he leaves. He stands right outside his own door for a few minutes, leaning against the wall breathing deeply, as he tries to not freak out over how damaged Galen is. How delicate the whole situation seems, he doesn't know if he's helping or making the situation worse with every action he takes, or everything he says.

Eventually he makes himself go into his room and get a glass of water for Galen and return to the other man.

He opens the door holding the glass of water he stops dead in the doorway, when he sees Galen on his knees at the foot of the bed. He takes an instinctive step backwards away and his hand shakes,  water sops over the side of the glass and he drags his eyes off Galen to wipe his wet hand down the front of his leg.   
“What are you doing?” He asks, desperately trying to keep his voice steady and not frighten Galen by raising his voice.   
“Mast- um, Cassian. I..” Galen stares at him, clearly totally terrified.

“Come on, into bed,” Cassian says, after a long pause, where he tries to find something, anything, to say that won't be flippant. He wishes briefly that there was anyone else to deal with Galen. But there isn't really, so he has to soldier on, trying to ignore the voice in his head screaming that he's doing more harm than good.

At his words Galen, hurries to his feet and climbs into the bed, lying face down across the mattress. His whole body is trembling finely. Fighting for composure Cassian grabs the sheet and drops it over Galen. He ignores the other man's obvious flinch as it lands on his body.

“Try to stay in bed, it'll be more comfortable for you than sleeping on the floor. If you need anything we are all on the same corridor.” he says to cover the silence, the turns and walks away. He feels like a coward but being near Galen is  _ hard _ . He's not used to terrifying the people he's trying to help yet he feels wrongfooted at every turn. 

He leaves Galen in bed, hopefully, sleeping, hopefully, and returns to his own rooms. He desperately wants to sleep, to try and forget the trails of the last few days of the last few hours in particular. Instead he pulls up a data pad and types in Galen's name determined to find all the information they have, and to update the information there is before they head down to the Med bay in the morning. The med staff will want everything he can tell them.

He’s surprised at the size of the file that he finds, but he clicks it open anyway. It's headed by a picture of a younger Galen, the man in the picture has a fuller face and looks younger and happier. It's a jarring difference compared to the man sleeping a few doors away.

Underneath is a date of birth and some basic information, including Galen’s homeworld and the date he 'returned’ to the Empire. Next is a set of pictures and holovids. Cassian looks at the tiny images that he will need to enlarge to get a true idea of the context but even as they are he can see heavy bruising on Galen’s face on at least one of them.

Skipping over them to come back and review later he goes looking for more information, he had always heard that Galen was a traitor but just going of the small amount of information in the file he thinks that it doesn't seem right. He skims over the information, picking out bits of text. 'has been exposed to violence.’ 'is known to be held on Eadu’ 'recent evidence suggests that Erso is not on Eadu voluntarily.’ 'recent footage shows clear evidence of abuse.’ As he scrolls through it becomes clearer that there had been at least some indication of the situation that Galen had been in and that the evidence of this was freely available. It was known amongst the Rebels. 

Confused as to why he'd been lead to believe all these years that Galen had been a traitor he reads further hoping for some level of reassurance.

He finds none.

Shaking and edgy he taps out a message to Draven, explaining the new situation, before hesitantly asking for clarification on the evidence he's found about Galen. He wants to simply type 'why’ but can't bring himself to ask so baldly. Draven is still his superior and he's already had enough of a mess of things by acting on his assumptions, he needs to stay calm and gather all the information before he acts.

Knowing he's stalling, he scrolls back up to the pictures. Hesitates, is he infringing of Galen's privacy? Should he look? On the one hand, they need all the information they can get, so far they seem to averaging a panic attack an hour and any clues as to behaviours that might prompt them is to be welcomed, on the other, by the sounds of it Galen has just spent the last 15 or so years acting as a dummy for the Empire, with few rights or protections. He waivers for a few moments then clicks on the first photo, any thing that can be done to gain intel is the best move he reasons.

The first few pictures aren't that bad, Galen becomes progressively sadder and more malnourished as the photos slide past. After about a dozen or so the evidence of abuse begins to show. At first it is relatively minor. Galen has a split lip, or a black eye, a bruise darkens the ridge of one of his cheekbones. But again, as the pictures progress so too does the evidence of violence. One picture it takes him a few long moments to understand, it looks like raw meat. After staring and rotating the image for a few moments, he realises it's Galen’s back. After he's been severely beaten. He winces, recoiling from the image, all too aware of the agony Galen must have endured. He known that the other man must have been whipped when he'd seen the scars that littered his back and shoulders but he hadn't given it much thought that. He'd been distracted by the necessity of everyday life, feeding, clothing and dressing the current wounds, he'd let the thoughts of old wounds lie. Now confronted, starkly, with the image of the beginnings of those scars he feels sick.

Swallowing back nausea, he goes on trying not to let the horror of what he sees hit him. He managed for a while until he finds a picture of Galen, terror and dread in his eyes, naked and bloody. There are bruises on his hips and thighs, blood smeared down the insides of his legs. 

Cassian turns away from the pad, setting it face down on the table and heading into the fresher to splash water in his face and looks at his reflection in the mirror. 

He'd known. He’s not stupid, and he's been around the rough areas of town long enough that little bits of Galen’s behaviour and his body language had added up and given him the whole story. But deep down he'd hoped, had desperately hoped he'd been wrong. When Galen had sat with his knees pressed protectively together while Baze had worked on his wound, he’d hoped that perhaps it was anxiety or a response to pain. He presses his hands over his eyes and tries not to think about how much Galen must have suffered.

His mind flashes back to the pictures that had been passed around the mess, the ones the men had laughed at and made crude jokes over, it had almost certainly been evidence of an act of the sexual violence that had been forced onto Galen. Doubtlessly not for the first or last time.   
There are videos too, right at the end and he hesitates again before he watches one. It feels like being complicit in Galen’s abuse somehow, he doubts that anyone would want their torture videos to be watched but in the end he opens the first one. He's been a spy his whole adult life, collecting information is what he knows. The med bay will appreciate having any facts he can give them at their disposal.

It's awful.

He'd hoped the vid would show Galen working or some of his ideas. At worst a beating or a punishment. 

Instead it shows vid, clearly pulled of a security feed in a hallway, of Galen being beaten and raped by a small group of men. It shows, in eerie silence, that somehow enhances the horror rather than makes the viewing more palatable, Galen struggling to escape the clutches of his abusers, at one point one of the men, clearly the ring leader, a tall blonde man, points what looks like a key card at Galen and he collapses, writhing. Clearly the collar can be activated manually as well as through disobedience. Despite everything he almost manages to get away, throws the slight ginger man off his back and lurches to his feet, clearly about to make a run for it. A large, dark haired man hits him with a truncheon and Galen collapses again. The others join in, until Galen is a bloody huddle on the floor. He's got his arms wrapped around his head and his knees pulled up in an attempt to protect his belly. He's held down and his clothes are stripped away. Cassian is grateful, and a little ashamed of his gratitude that Galen is facing away from the camera and he won't have to see the pain and distress on the man's face as his is defiled. He checks the amount of time left when the first man starts to pull out his cock, 41 minutes. He decides to skip through until about 3 minutes from the end, he seen enough to get an idea of what's about to happen. He doesn't want to sit through the entire thing. He probably should for the intel on triggers but from what he's seen mostly it was the collar and brute force. It's no wonder Galen was so confused by care. No wonder that he didn't believe that food or care was being shown to him freely.  He clicks forward, Galen is mostly under the body of a huge man, his clenched hands give away his pain just as clearly as screams would. He focuses on the man on top of Galen then clicks back to the beginning. Not there. He ends up clicking throughout the vid, to find the moment the stranger appears. 28 minutes in. He's simply walking past, he stops to watch for a few moments the decides to join in. He clicks back to the end of the vid. The big man stills, then climbs off and begins to rearrange himself and zips up his trousers. Galen makes a frenzied grab for his clothes, tugging the cloth over himself and zipping up right to the top. He gives the zipper and extra couple of tugs as though he can pull it higher and hide more of himself from view. One of the original men grabs a hold of the from of his jumpsuit and tugs him forwards. As he steps closer to the camera, Cassian gets a better view of his face. Cassian feels a frisson of surprise, he'd been expecting tears on the older man's face. Instead it's dry, starkly white, pained and strained. But tear free.

Sighing, Cassian pulls up a blank document and begins to list the information that he knows and the things the med staff will want to know.  _ Underweight, scars, had been collared- possible nerve damage?  _ He swallows hard then writes  _ sexual abuse. _ He'd love to be able to write 'possible’ or 'suspected’ but he knows the truth and avoiding it won't help anyone. Once he's finished his list he’ll send it down to Kas, who’s one of the few doctors traveling with them and thankfully he's one of the very few with excellent bedside manner. The alliance seem to manage to find gruff 'rub some dirt on it’ types, at every opportunity and medical staff is no exception. 

Then he goes back to the vids, clicks on the next one with dread curdling in his belly. The vid starts with an unfamiliar man's face very close to the screen, Cassian takes a screenshot to record the newcomers identity, then allows the vid to play on. The man steps back revealing a bed behind him. Cassian feels his heart sink. The door opens and Galen is shoved in by a guard, and Cassian sees the moment that Galen notices the bed as his eyes close in despair. 

'Come in, make yourself at home.” 

Cassian jumps violently he hadn't realised that this vid had sound. On-screen Galen swallows audibly and Cassian notices as he tries to hide behind his hands. Cupping them protectively in front of his groin.

“Right, well let's get started. Clothes off and on the bed. You know the drill.”

“Please,” Galen says, his voice strained. “Sir, Master, please, Krennic needs the figures for the simulation he needs to know the charging time for the weapon. Please-”

“You've had plenty of time.” The man interrupts and Cassian wants to be able to reach through the screen and through time and space and strangle him. “You can't put off your work in an attempt to avoid your other duties.”

Cassian sees Galen close his eyes again as his abuse is called his 'duty’. 

“Please,” Galen tries again. “Please, sir, I-, I was taken to the b-” Galen's voice breaks and his shoulders jerk. “The, the barracks, sir.” Galen's trembling visibly worsens at the mention of the barracks and Cassian adds it to his list.

“Oh,” the man says, drawing out the word, fake sincerity oozing from the word. “I see, used all night then? Guess you're sore?”

Galen fidgets, shifting a little from foot to foot, he swallows and looks away. His shame so evident that Cassian aches to comfort him, cannot understand the actions of the abuser in the vid. How he can make himself continue without offering aid.

“Well?” The man demands instead.

At the harsh words Galen jumps, then wipes his eyes and nods.

“Well?” The man prompts louder.

“Yes, sir.” 

“So I suppose then that this,” the guard waves first at his groin then between himself and Galen. “Is going to hurt quite a lot then.”

Galen nods, his shoulders slumping and his head hanging.

“Clothes off and on the bed.” The man repeats.

Galen doesn't move, just stands breathing raggedly. The man sighs and pulls out the same card as had been visible in the previous vid and activates it.

Cassian recoils and jumps for the volume control as Galen screams as though he's on fire and drops to the floor, twisting and squirming in a futile effort to get away from the source of his agony.

The man clicks off the controller and puts it back in his pocket, the steps closer to where Galen is huddled in a ball with his arms clasped protectively over his head.

“Get up, clothes off and on the bed.” Each statement is punctuated with a vicious kick.

Galen struggles to his feet and Cassian can see the moment he realises that obedience is his only option. Naked and vulnerable Galen steps up to the bed then sits down. He brings his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around them, before shifting back to sit against the headboard looking around the room with wide, scared eyes. He noticed the camera and blanches.

The man follows his eyes and grins, “noticed finally, then?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Yes? Or did someone tell you?”

There is a long pause, before Galen admits, “I was told.”

The man chuckles and begins undoing his belt. Galen's eyes track the movement, Cassian can't see his face clearly enough to see the fear but he knows it's there.

“Turn over, onto your belly. And spread your legs.” There's a pause where Galen merely curls even more tightly into himself. The man steps up and the crack of the slap makes Cassian jump and turn the volume down again. The man doesn't give Galen any further opportunity to comply, simply clambers up onto the bed and begins to manhandle him into position. 

Galen screams at the first thrust, his body arching and he begins to instinctively struggle against the man who is hurting him. 

Cassian listens sickened to the slap of flesh on flesh and Galen's cries of pain. He can see Galen’s desperate attempts to muffle himself with the sheets and his hands but the evidence of his agony is clear audible despite it. 

When the man finishes he pulls out and Galen let's out a noise that can only be described as a yelp. He sounds like a dog that's had a paw trodden on. Cassian winces in sympathy. So far Galen has been silent throughout his stay. Cassian doesn't know if that means he's pain free or if he's been trained not to show his pain. It's obvious from the vid he's trying to hide his suffering.

“As you've got so much busy work to do, I'll let you get back to work. But you should know that Peters will be after you so I'd keep your head down if I were you.” he chuckles and shoves Galen off the bed.

Galen goes down with a thump and it's almost half a minute before he reappears. Moving slowly and stiffly towards his clothing.

Sighing Cassian shuts down the vid and clicks on the next. He goes through the rest quickly, just skimming through, watching, mostly, with the sound off, he doesn't want to wake the others. Adding to his list as he watches. 

It takes more than an hour to go through them and by the end he has a significant amount of innocuous items that he has seen utilised to brutalise Galen, everything from a flashlight to a pen, when a stormtrooper almost casually stabbed him in the ribs. 

Once the loathsome task is complete he sends the lists of to both Draven and Kas, then he rolls into bed. He remembers to take his clothes off this time and he even managed to pull back the blankets. Sleep doesn't come quickly and it takes him a long time to begin to calm down. Guilt, horror and dismay swirl through him. 

He feels like he's only just dropped off, had barely slept at all when screams wake him. For a moment he can't work out where the screams are coming from, it takes him straight back to his last days on Fest. When he was orphaned. He heard screams then too.

Then remembrance returns.

He scrambles out of bed and into the hallway. Baze nearly falls out of the room opposite. It occurs to him for a moment that he could let Baze go, let him handle it. He wavers before shoving the though away hard.

“I'll go,” he says, “you've barely got any clothes on.”  _ There is no point, at all, in sitting through over an hour of horrible vids, if you then let a nearly naked man blunder into the bedroom of an, already terrified, rape victim _ , he thinks.

Pushing, gently, past Baze he opens Galen's door and let's it close behind him, before turning to the huddled figure on the bed. 

He leans over and grabs Galen by the shoulder, shaking gently. “Hey, hey, you're okay. It's alright, you're ok.” He knows it's not, but can't help the stream of nonsense leaving his mouth.

Under his hands Galen goes suddenly and completely still. The screams cut off, and the air seems to ring in the silence. Then Galen gasps in a wet breath, before stifling himself. To Cassian's disgust, Galen goes limp and turns his face away. The knowledge that he's frightened the older man makes him hate himself just a little more, that he's inspired the same vulnerable surrender as the monsters that trained him is horrendous.

“Galen?” he whispers, trying to figure out the best course of action.

Galen flinches before going absolutely still, barely breathing. After a long moment it becomes clear he isn't going to speak. Cassian shuffles backwards a bit and gropes for the light.

“Galen,” he asks again, blinking against the light. He sits slowly ensuring there is a space between them, perches on the edge of the bed. In the half light, Galen looks even thinner, his face is all edges and angles, with dark hollows and shadows smudged under tired eyes.   
“Yes, Ca- Cassian?” It's a quiet whisper, but Galen has remembered to call him Cassian. Training or bravery? 

“Are you alright?” he winces at how stupid the question is, “You were screaming..” he trails off, grief for Galen catches at his throat but tears and hysterics won't fix anything. Calm compassion might.

“I.. I'm.. I was.." He swallows, "m' sorry Mas-Cassian,” exhaustion and terror slurring his words.  _ So much for that, _ Cassian thinks, trying to smile reassuringly. “No, it's not.. you're not in trouble.” He reaches out and places a hand on Galen’s bicep, tugs forward gently. Galen follows the guiding pressure of the palm encircling his arm, obediently, until he's pressed into Cassian's side, his face tucked into Cassian's shoulder.

Galen holds himself stiffly in the embrace, and Cassian wonders if he's made a huge mistake. He smooths a hand up Galen’s back and then down. Making sure not to let his hand drop and further than Galen’s waist. Keeping his touch as light and non threatening as he can.

Gradually, Galen relaxes in the warmth of the hold, and Cassian feels like he can breathe again. He can tell the exact moment that Galen begins to fall asleep, and panics. Should he move? Or let the other man sleep? What is the best solution. 

In the end he stays put when he realises that Galen is clutching onto his shirt, fingers cinched into the thin material. It hits him, a sharp stab to his heart, that Galen may not have received any kind of touch that hadn't hurt since he'd been captured. That this could be the first time he's been able to hold onto another person without being severely punished for his audacity.

The realisation make him think of the pictures and videos in the files, and in his mind's eye he can see Galen’s haunted face, filled with fear and dread. Knowing that, most likely, nobody provided him with any care or comfort makes him tear up as he lies in the dark holding Galen close. He blinks them back, shuts his eyes and desperately tried not to imagine the amount of times Galen must have been left to try and calm himself after a nightmare. Or the waking nightmare, that his life must have been. 

The men who attacked him hadn't been stealthy, they hadn't tried to avoid leaving marks, so they hadn't been bothered about being found out. Suggesting that everybody on the base was at least aware of what they were doing. Which in turn suggests that it wasn't an event that was banned or discouraged. Which probably meant that it wouldn't have been a rare occurrence or a one off.

He drifts into an uneasy sleep, mind picking over Galen's captivity, of his suffering.

He wakes in the morning, and knows at once that Galen is awake in his arms. The other man is clearly terror stricken. He can feel Galen’s heart beating a rapid taboo against the palm of his hand stretched across Galen’s chest and through Galen's back, where it's pressed into his chest. He shifts to slowly roll away, and his morning erection grazes across Galen’s trouser class buttocks. Fighting not to visibly react, apologies will upset Galen, it clearly is unexpected and it's becoming clear that if it deviates from the norm, then it is a source of anxiety for Galen. 

He smiles at Galen, trying to look unthreatening and is hugely relieved when Galen smiles back. It's awkward but its progress nonetheless.

Cassian sits up and swings his legs out of bed, “come on, you've got an appointment to get to.” He reminds Galen.

Immediately he knows he's pitched it wrongly. He'd been aiming for light hearted, but it's clear from the tension is Galen’s hands where they are bunched on top of the sheets, and the sudden blankness in his face, that he’s managed to frighten Galen already.   
"Are you going to dispose of me?" Galen asks, and he is clearly going for nonchalance, but the whites are showing all around his eyes and his voice trembles just slightly.

“No!” Cassian denies, vehemently. He has to stifle an urge to gather Galen back into his arms and hold him, until he  _ understands _ . 

"I'm sorry,"  Galen says uncertainly. "I know I've got… I have no right to demand answers from you. I just…. I want to know how I can be useful."

Cassian feels his heart sink, he wants to disagree with Galen, he does have the right to demand answers after all, but is not inclined to risk a panic attack this early in the day. 

“You don't need to be useful,” he reassures, trying to impress the certainty he feels into his voice.

It doesn't work, Galen beings to tremble. “Please,” the words is whispered, then Galen visibly bites back any further pleas. Clearly experience has taught him to not expect mercy.

“What? What's wrong?” Cassian asks, helpless and despairing.

“Please, I can be useful, I know about the Death Star. Please.. don't..” the sound of Galen’s desperate begging sets his teeth on edge “ Don't play games with me.” Cassian winces, as the though of the games that were previously 'played’ with Galen run through his mind. Instinctively he reaches out,  _ it worked last night, _ he thinks. He wraps Galen back in his arms and holds him close. Giving in to the temptation to try and provide the comfort the other man had clearly been denied for so many years. He doesn't say anything just holds on as Galen shakes and gasps in his arms. 

Eventually, after almost half an hour, Galen calms enough that he feels as though he can risk trying to talk this out without setting off another panic attack.

“Alright, no games. I'll tell you what's going to happen and if you can't do it then we will work it out until you can.”

In his arms Galen nods, then ducks his head a little further. He wished he could see Galen’s face. To try and get a read on the other man’s mood.

“You need a check up, your side is still healing, it'll be nothing bad,” he says gently, struggling to get the key points across with patronising the other man. “it won't hurt.” Galen clearly does not believe him at all, but nods bravely regardless.

The helpless little gesture breaks his heart a little more. Vowing to do better, Cassian climbs out of bed and offers Galen a hand. The sooner they get this done the better.

Galen is clearly petrified of the med bay.  _ Aversion to medical settings?  _ He wonders,  _ or is it medical staff? Or the instruments that can be found in a Med Bay? Or is it the association. _ After all Galen must have received enough serious wounds over the years to have spent a great deal of time in medical. Perhaps part of the problem is mere association. He looks at the stiff muscles of Galen’s thin shoulders and knows he's wrong.

“Do you want me to wait outside?” He asks, wondering if he's part of Galen’s anxiety. Perhaps he'd like some privacy and is trying to figure out the best way to ask for it.

At the question Galen’s shoulders hunch even higher and Cassian can hear the missed beat of his breathing.

“Or, I can come in and sit off to the side. I'm not busy.” He lies. “Honestly, whichever you prefer.”

“Stay, please. Mast- sir, Cassian. Please.”

“Ok, that's fine. If you want privacy though just say the word.” He doubts that Galen will but he needs to say it.

Kas and Swiduff are there to meet them and Swiduff sets about coaxing Galen away to begin the preliminary tests. Cassian follows Kas’ unspoken order and follows to the opposite side of the room.

“It's ok, honey.” he hears and feels himself relax a bit, knowing Galen is in good hands. While fierce and no nonsense, Swiduff is one of the best nurses they have, she’s calm and practical with enough social skills to have a warmth in her manner that most of the older doctors have lost over the years of seeing countless young men and women die in service. He can't help but glance over, Galen is a hunched huddled on the bed, body language tense and mistrustful.

“We got your message.” Kas says, drawing his attention back, “if we can we're going to try and get a full blood panel and do a full exam. We'll have to see how skittish he is. If he doesn't want it, I can't force him.”

“I know.” Cassian interjects, a little more forcefully than he'd intended. “I know.” He repeats.

Kas nods, his eyes sympathetic. “Rough few days?” He guesses.

“I'm screwing this up.” Cassian confesses, “I don't know what I'm doing. I just keep scaring him, and I don't even mean to.”

“Cass, he's going to be scared. That's not your fault. Less than 2 days ago he was being held prisoner by ruthless sociopaths. From your list and the general state of him, his time there was at best,  _ at best,  _ neglectful, at worst outright brutal. He's going to expect more of the same. Because why wouldn't he? It's all about time. Patience and time.” Kas smiles, bittersweet and slow, “it's been barely more than 48 hours, Cass, 48 hours since he was shot and captured by the opposing army, it's no wonder he's afraid. Anyone would be. Just keep up the key points of what you have been doing. Food, rest. We can sort the rest out in time.” 

“He keeps throwing up.”

“I'll take a look at his belly. It’s probably a combination of stress and a change in diet. If I can I'll find out what he's used to eating and when he's used to being fed. He may have to go liquids only for a while anway. Let's see what the results are.”

He watches as Kas walks away, presumably to start setting things up, and tries to unobtrusively keep an eye on Galen. Swiduff is weighing him and he can see the tightness in her mouth as she scribbles down the numbers from the scales.

He leans back against the wall and closes his eyes as he listens to Swiduff walk Galen through the process of getting him checked over. Galen is quiet but he doesn't seem to be freaking out so at least there has been a small improvement on yesterday. No vomit and only two panic attacks. He huffs at himself.

“Hmmm, that didn't fill quite the way I was expecting are you alright for me to take your blood pressure?”

He opens his eyes again and glances over at Swidduff’s words, she seems concerned, and he feels a prickle of worry for Galen.  _ If there is something wrong with him and I didn't bring him yesterday I'll never forgive myself.  _ He thinks worriedly, biting the inside of his cheek anxiously.

Across the room Swiduff takes his blood pressure then examines the blaster wound. Galen looks uncomfortable at her hands on his body, his feet twist anxiously, but the rest of him remains obediently still. 

Swiduff draws the curtain around the bed and then steps through as Kas walks over and disappears behind the covering.

There is a few moments of silence, Swiduff busies herself nearby before adding a note to a datapad and coming over to him. She leans on the wall next to him.

“You know, I can't give you specifics. Not unless he gives me permission to talk to you, but he's not in any immediate danger. He's too thin and needs a greater degree of care than has been previously shown to him. He's not in any danger of dying right this moment though.”

Cassian lets out a breath than he hadn't been consciously aware that he'd been holding. “Thank the force for that.” He tells her softly. “He's been through enough.”

She nods and her hair brushes his shoulder. “He's going to need time to recover though.” She warns.

“I wasn't about to send him of on a mission.” He snarks back.

The curtain is drawn back, interrupts get the retort that he knows Swiduff wants to fling at him.

He heads over at once, aware that this must have been a terrifying and bewildering ordeal for Galen.

He crouches when he reaches him, remembering Bodhi from yesterday, “Are you alright?”

“I'm not supposed to have anal sex until I've healed.” While feeling a bit sick, he’s relieved that Galen understands that they have his best interests at heart. “No,” Galen corrects himself,  “been signed off, I don't know when that will be.” 

Cassian feels his heart sink and the sick feeling grows, the difference between 'healed’ and 'signed off’ might sound slight but he knows by the expression on Galen’s face that the distinction between them is a matter of huge concern for him.

“Oh, ok.” he says, lamely. His mind struggles to come up with something, anything, that may act as a comfort. Tries to find the adequate words to explain that here Galen need only sleep with people that he  _ wants to. _ Gritting his teeth, he opens his mouth to try and explain properly, but he's interrupted by the return of Kas and Swiduff.

Swiduff places two stools down, the grabs his arm so he steps back and sits down. They sit in the little semi circle, and Cassian can see Galen’s breathing pick up a little.

“Well, you're very underweight, “ Swiduff begins, “the preliminary bloods suggest that you are anemic, your cholesterol is low though, your blood pressure is very low, do you ever feel faint?”

“No?” Galen says, and it's so obviously a lie, Cassian almost feels embarrassed for him. But it's drowned out by concern that Galen would feel the need to lie. He sees that Kas had caught the note in Galen's voice too.

“Cassian said you were having trouble keeping food down? What are you used to eating?” Swiduff asks, moving on from the awkward moment.   
“If I'd been acceptable, I got my rations in the evening.” Galen replies, carefully not answering.   
“What did your 'rations’ consist of?”   
“What was left.” Galen admits painfully.

Cassian really wants to press him for proper answers but can't bring himself to get involved, risking making the whole situation worse.

The medical staff don't say anything and after almost a full minute of silence, Galen continues unprompted. “sometimes bread, or soup, or porridge. Sometimes I'd get Masters leftovers, if I'd been very good.” he sounds almost wistful, and Cassian feels another surge of nausea. 

In the ensuing silence the gurgle of Galen’s belly is loud and he blushes, before looking at them worriedly from under his fringe.

“Hungry now then? That's good, we'll need to get you into a more regular pattern than that, once a day isn't going to be often enough to put the weight back on you. It'll be little and often for now. We will try very bland foods or some meal replacements for invalids to get you started. It's probably the stress of upheaval that's causing the nausea, more than anything. Eat slowly and stop when you feel full, you can have more after an hour or so, alright? Slow and steady.” Swiduff says then turns slightly so that she is speaking to both of them. “lots of rest, alright. You need your rest to recovery properly, i'll send your painkillers and the rest of your meds to your room when they need to be taken, don't skip a dose, take them as soon as you get them. Some gentle exercise if you want it, but nothing too taxing or vigorous.” She pauses, “We will give you a ring when your results come through and you can come down for another chat. If you need any more medication we can see to it then, if you need anything though just come back. Anytime, someone will be here.” She looks between the three men, pauses then prompts, “is there anything you need to ask?”   
Galen shakes his head, sitting at his side Cassian murmurs a negative.

“Well, off you go then, don't forget to rest. It would probably be best to go and make up one of the replacement shakes now, start getting some nutrition.” Swiduff says, she looks over at Cassian and raises an eyebrow meaningfully, as though he might have missed her point.

He stands up, and Galen hops down from the bed to stand next to him. Cassian heads for the door, mentally planning the rest of the day, before noticing that Galen is not with him. Galen? Do you want to talk to Kas in private?” he asks, making sure to keep his voice even and his body language open and non threatening.

“No,” Galen denies at once, looking a little panicked, “no, thank you.”

“Ok, well then let's go and get some lunch, it's a bit early but I've not had breakfast yet and Bodhi is always read for a meal. Thanks Kas, Swiduff.”   
“Thank you.” Galen echoes abruptly.

He collects the nutrition powder from Swiduff, then leads Galen back to the mess. He makes a big effort to walk slowly and give Galen time to look around and learn his surroundings. He finds Kay on the way and suggests a meal. Kay lumbers off to collect the others, so he drops Galen off at an empty table, waits until Bodhi's arrives, and goes to rehydrate the nutrition powder. He quickly realised that he should have added the powder after the water, or heated the water or shaken the mixture or something as the powder is difficult to adequately disperse in the liquid, instead forming into clumps.

After mixing for a few minutes he returns to the table, worried about leaving Galen and Bodhi alone too long. While the rebels are good people, they are a little wary of having a couple of Imperials roaming loose amongst them. Cassian is determined to keep any altercations to a minimum or for preference avoid them entirely.

To his relief, Kas gas brought Baze and Chirrut, Baze eyes the glass of lumpy powder, then rolls his eyes, “how did you manage to mess up rehydrating a powder?”

“It's fine, I stirred for ages!” He protests, not wanting Galen to think he hadn't bothered or cared.   
Baze rolls his eyes even harder and gestures for the glass, he wanders off with it and reappears with a spoon. Retaking his seat, everybody sits in silence watching Baze stir the contents as though it's the most interesting thing they've ever seen, listening to the clink, clink of metal hitting glass.

Baze slides the glass over and a very small amount sops over the side, Galen pulls his hands back inhaling sharply, clearly expecting to be shocked for the spill.   
“It's alright, my fault.” Baze says slowly, both hands held upright his palms outward, Galen flinches slightly and Baze lowers them again. “Sorry.”   
The apology makes Galen curl into himself, clearly ill at ease.

Baze puts both hands flat onto the table and keeps them there, Galen looks at the drink, it's still undulating slightly in the glass, the energy that's been imparted to the molecules has not quite been thoroughly dispersed.   
“Drink up.” Cassian tells him nodding cheerfully at the glass, “please!” he adds, determined not to order Galen to do anything.   
Galen stops at the blurted syllables, blinking in a manner befitting the characters on children's holovids shows from when he was a child.   
“Please,” Cassian reiterates calmly, “ you don't have to finish it if you feel full, or if you don't like it.”

Galen blinks, clearly surprised. It's a little heartbreaking that he clearly has no recollection of not liking foods, he simply wants to be fed. To not be forgotten by his Master.

Slowly, slowly,” Bodhi chimes in, “take your time, there's no rush.”   
Galen nods, and sips at his food.   
“Come on, let's get our own food.” Chirrut says, nodding at Cassian while grabbing at Baze’s shoulder. 

He follows the older couple, grabs a tray and tries to decide which of the unappetising options he'd prefer. Back at the table he can see that Galen is obviously in dire need of a nap, and with the advice from the med bay ringing in his ears, he's determined that Galen at least be given the opportunity to rest.

It's Bodhi though that addresses the situation, after Galen almost topples our of his chair sideways, “Sleepy?” Bodhi asks, his face sweetly anxious, clearly worried that this is something more sinister. Cassian adds the need to fill the others in onto his growing to do list. Galen twitches away, in a manner that is becoming clear is an instinctive reaction and is something that he will do regardless of what is happening. Bodhi smiles gentle and sad, and holds both his hands up, placatingly, “it's alright. You look as though you could do with more rest. They worked you like a sla-” Cassian winces at the word,  _ yes, _ he thinks,  _ they worked him exactly like a slave. They nearly worked him to death. _ “Well, uh. Yeah. You were overworked, it's not surprising that you're tired Come on.” Bodhi finishes, stretching out a hand, and Galen looks at it warily as though he's expecting a slap, Bodhi lets it hang there for a few moments then slowly,  gently gestures for Galen to come with him. Galen pulls himself to his feet, it looks as though his body moves on autopilot after so many years or obedience benign drilled into it, and follows Bodhi out of the canteen.

“Woah!” he cries as he enters the rec room and finds Galen kneeling at Bodhi’s feet. At his shout Galen jerks, his body brushes against Bodhi's knee, and Bodhi’s hands come up and grab him by the shoulders. Galen kneels absolutely still.

“What's going on?” Cassian demands, absolutely furious.   
“Don't yell, Cassian.” Baze says, calm as anything, stepping around them all so he can see what's happening. “Are you two alright? What happened?” Cassian swallows back his angry retort.

“I said to make yourself comfy.” Bodhi says, giving Cassian a  glare as he does, “ Is this comfortable for you?” He asks Galen. “Or did you think this is what I wanted?”   
“I.. m’sorry, Ma-sir.” Galen stammers, clearly frightened, he's trembling again.   
“That's alright you didn't do anything wrong. This is just a misunderstanding, right?” Bodhi nods as he says the words, and Galen nods along with him, eager to please. “I wouldn't let you do that back on Eadu and I don't want it from you here either.”

Cassian can see at once that Galen had not taken the words in the manner in which Bodhi clearly intended them.“Alright, ok, come on. Breathe, breathe for me. Galen?” he tries to soothe.   
“How do I..” Galen pauses, his breathing ragged and strained, “thank you?” Galen asks his voice hitching and miserable.

“You don't have to,” Bodhi tells him. Despite the kindness lacing Bodhi’s tone, Galen panics and Cassian can see his ribs heave with every gasping breath he takes.

“We want you to do what you need to to feel safe and to help yourself calm down.” He tells Galen, hoping that Galen will be able to calm himself quicker than they can. He thinks if they can't soothe him quickly then he will need to comm Kas for a sedative. The memory of Galen’s stifled sob rises, when they had dropped him onto the bed in the med bay on his first day, when he’d only just been conscious enough to know he was on a bed and being held down.

Galen moves, folding himself back into the same crouched bow than he'd done when Cassian had shouted at him the day before and Cassian feels the guilt that Galen often inspires in him make another appearance.

“Does this make you feel safer?” Baze asks, and he sounds as horrified as Cassian feels.

Ok then, if that's what is best for you then you do it.”   
“Cassian!” Baze snaps, and Bodhi looks between them both, his dark eyes grave.   
“If it helps him, let him do it. What do you want me to do?” Cassian replies, concern for Galen and his frail state overriding the need to meets Baze’s expectations of him. As Galen’s breathing slows and becomes  more regular and his trembling slows, he risks a little positive reinforcement. “Ok, that's good. You're being very good.”   
“He's not a dog!” Baze snaps and Cassian really, really needs to sit everybody down and have a chat about not shouting around the traumatized ex-slave. It's seriously unhelpful.   
“I know. But if it helps to calm everything down, then let's just-" he starts, fighting to keep the irritation out of his voice, it won't help matters and he knows that Galen will take it personally. For the last decade or so the people around him would probably have taken their anger out on him whether he had anything to do with it or not.   
“Not talk about Galen as though he can't hear us?” Baze says, shamefaced.

Carefully he sits down as Baze and Chirrut mirror his movements, it's odd. Galen remains on his knees, face pressed to the floor and it's hard to ignore him, but any attempt to get involved will make things worse.  _ Slowly, slowly. _ He tells himself.

Bodhi begins to read aloud from a pad, it's about interplanetary trade embargoes and the impact on fishing quotas. It's beyond boring, but as Bodhi drones on and on, Galen begins to relax. His breathing smoothes out and he slumps closer to the floor.

When he is certain that Galen is asleep, he carefully eases the other man onto the sofa. It's a risky move, his first though was to leave Galen be, worried that moving the other man would wake him or cause him to panic when he woke up in a different place, but in the end the realisation that the Imperials would have left him on his knees, submitting to their cruelty, makes him act.

It's easy, far too easy, to pick Galen up. For a man his size he's very light. As soon as he let's go Galen curls into the tiniest ball he has ever seen a grown man manage. It causes a swell of sadness, it's clearly a learned response, it's not a comfortable position. Preservation of heat, trying to be small, insignificant and stay out of sight, that's the purpose behind curling up so small. Perching on the very edge of the couch cushions, he gently rubs Galen’s back, as he did during the night, until the older man’s posture relaxes and he unfurls a little into a less defensive position.

After a few minutes, just spent watching the flicker of Galen’s eyes under his lids, and wishing he could defend Galen from his nightmares, he returns to his seat.

“I have brought the weapons that did not function at full capacity on the latest mission.” Kay informs him.

“Thanks, Kay. Let's take a look shall we?” It's just the kind of work he needs, repetitive and simple. Yet, with every blaster he fixes he feels a little better, they are small achievements but they help he feel in control. It's a soothing task and he is reminded again of how much more than a machine Kay is.

He looks up at a murmured apology, Baze had sat down on the sofa and half woken Galen. Who blinks blearily at them all, his hair is a wild tangle, before dropping back off to sleep, the sleep of the absolutely exhausted, when Bodhi gently pets his hair down.

After a few hours he knows he needs to wake Galen, he is supposed to be getting the other man back into a regular pattern of meal times. He gently shakes Galen awake, being certain to not make any loud noises.

“I don't think you should wake him so roughly, I have a bad feeling about this.” Kay tells him, and he waves a hand in a 'shut up’ gesture.  At his urging Galen sits up blearily, scrubbing at his face with the heels of his hands, Cassian smiles down at him, he looks surprisingly cute when he's rumpled. To his surprised delight Galen smiles tentatively back, avoiding eye contact but it's still more interaction than he's made before and Cassian has to force down the desire to draw attention to it. 

“That went better than anticipated.”

“I'm not completely useless, you know.” He tells Kay, and grins when he hears both a disbelieving snort from Kay and a soft huff of laughter from Galen.

To his dismay Galen immediately tensed, he can see the tension in Galen's thin shoulders through the cloth of his shirt. “Come on,” he says extending his hand out to Galen. Who twitches back, clearly terrified of Cassian's response to him laughing at a joke than Cassian made.

There is a small pause, long enough for Cassian to notice, then Galen reaches out. He doesn't make contact and Cassian can see his hand shake from nerves but it's progress.

“Come on, let's get you some food, Nurse Swiduf will have my head if you're not eating every few hours. And she's fierce, you know. You can be brave enough to face down all kinds of scary things but everyone quails before Reesemme Swiduf.”

“I don't,” Kaytoo interjects “my casing is designed to withstand higher forces than those likely to be inflicted by a small human woman.”   
“You're still afraid of her.”   
“It's a healthy respect.”   
“Only living thing you show that for!”

Still holding Galen’s hand within his Cassian leads the way to the canteen and steers them towards a table Kaytoo heads off to collect food and Cassian calls, “Bring the replacements,” over his shoulder at the retreating droid. Cassian brushes a thumb over the back of Galen’s hand absently before letting go. Trying to give the other man his space when he can.

The others begin to draw Galen into conversation sticking to neutral topics in an effort to refrain from worrying him.

“Is there anything you don't eat?” Baze asks, and cassian pricks up his ears. It's a good question for when they start trying to get Galen back onto solids, if he has allergies then it's best to know beforehand.

“I'll eat anything.” Galen mumbles looking down at the table.   
“But there must be things that you like more than others?” Bodhi insists, to a quiet agreeing hum from Baze.

Kaytoo returns with a couple of plates and a mug. He sets the plates down and gives the mug to Galen and Cassian is a little disheartened to see that he automatically turns to Bodhi and himself for confirmation. 

They both nod almost simultaneously, Cassian presses Galen's fingers around the ceramic, gently. “Drink up.” he says trying to show all the sincerity he feels in his words and actions.   
“It might not taste great,” Bodhi warns. “You don't have to have it, there are other flavours if you don't like it.”   
“We'll get you started on something nicer in a day or two, when you're more settled,” Chirrut adds. “Once you get signed off.”

Galen takes a sip from the mug and his face relaxes a little so it can't be too awful Cassian reasons.

Baze hands around dishes and everyone begins to dig into their food, little sounds of chewing and clink of cutlery on crockery is the only sounds for a little while. 

Galen begins to relax a little, Cassian can see his posture becoming less rigid and more open. Attempting to make good use of the lull, Cassian gently questions, “so what is your favourite food?”

“I..sir? I don’t know.” Galen murmurs, his tense body language reappearing in an instant.

“Feeding can be thought of as synonymous to refueling,” Kaytoo tells him abruptly, as the silence stretches while Galen struggles to regulate his breathing besides them.

Cassian falls silent, his head swivels between Galen and the robot for a long moment, then he scrubs a hand through his hair and sighs.“Sorry Galen. I guess for you it's just been a case of whatever food you could get your hands on, right?” As soon as the words leave his mouth he could kick himself when he sees the pallor of Galen’s face.   
“I wouldn't steal.” Galen gasps almost dropping his mug in his hurry to persuade Cassian. “I.. I'm not going to..” Galen's face is almost grey in his anxiety.   
“It's alright.” Cassian soothes. “It's alright.” He plasters on his most reassuring smile. “I know you wouldn't steal. I'm not accusing you of anything.” Galen doesn't look at all comforted but he does take another sip of his drink and he doesn't have another panic attack so Cassian has to take it as a win.

After dinner he gets a message from Kas asking that Galen be returned to the med back for his results and a regime of medicine to be administered.

“Hey,” he says, “Kas would like you back in the med bay for your results, won't take long.” He hopes that is a reassurance. “Is that alright with you?”

Galen nods desperately, and Cassian feels the positivity he'd felt over Galen reaching out to him die a little and then feels angry with himself for becoming so discouraged.

“Alright then,” he says, “let's go.”

He wants to reach out for Galen’s hand again, to offer a little physical reassurance but has no idea if Galen had suffered physical abuse at the hands of the medics on Eadu. It seems likely given the extent of his obvious trauma, perhaps offering physical comfort will be mistaken for an attempt at recreating those past experience. Sighing at his own ineptitude, cassian leads the way to the Med Bay.

“Hi, there.” Kas says from his desk as soon as they enter, “How are you feeling?”

“Better sir.”

“Good, i'm very glad to hear it. I’ve got the results from the tests that we did.” He holds up a paper, “I'll talk you through the results while Nurse Edake administers your medication to Captain Andor. As a precaution it has been decided that all potentially dangerous chemicals are to be handled by Alliance members, that isn't something that is limited to you. Captain Andor has the medications for several other members of your group that were injured during your extraction.”

“Yes, sir.”

Hearing the dismissal for what it is, Cassian wanders over to the dispensing nurse and takes possession of an alarming number of pills. 

“I'm just going to sort them into a tray for you,” the motherly nurse tell him, “it'll separate the drugs into the right days and times that they need to be administered. Try to keep to the schedule, if you miss a dose take one as soon as you remember.” 

Cassian nods, he's heard the spiel plenty of times. Normally in relation to himself but he figures that it's the same in practice.

By the times she's finished organising the medications Galen is waiting for him. He can tell by the shame that is radiating of the other man in waves that his results were not what he’d been hoping for. It's not a surprise really, he'd doubted that the Imperials had ever provided Galen with adequate care or testing during his captivity, but he'd hoped that perhaps they’d done a decent enough job of keeping their members venereal disease free. Given by the tense set of Galen’s shoulders and the evident self-loathing on his face that hasn't been the case.

“Alright?” he asks once they are in the corridor heading back to Galen’s rooms. “You don't have to tell me.” he adds quickly not wanting to accidentally force Galen to tell him.

“I’ve got an infection.” Galen mumbles.

“Yeah?” Cassian prompts gently, “well, it's not going to be anything that we can't handle.”

“The clap.”

The sadness and shame in Galen’s voice brings  tears to his eyes and causes his voice to catch a little as he speaks. “It’s not your fault. I want you to know that even if you feel like you can't believe it right now, but none of this is your fault.”

Galen doesn't reply, but his swallow is audible and his breathing is a little ragged.

“Ok, well why don't you take the first course of your meds?” he says once they reach Galen’s room, “If you're tired you can head to be or if you want we are going to be heading down to rec room 6, remember where it is?”

“May I please shower?”

“Of course. But can you take your meds first?”

At Galen’s nod he hands them over, then let's himself out figuring that Galen must want some time for himself after everything that has happened in the last few days and the news he's just received.

He knocks gently on Galen's door on his way back to his own room and Galen answers almost immediately. The older man's eyes look red and sore and Cassian longs to pull him into an embrace and comfort him but now that such a move will not be well received.

“Hey, I just wanted to check up on you. I know you had a tough day.”

“Do you want to come in?” Galen asks.

“Not unless you want the company.” He replies honestly. “If you want to talk or want some company then I'll come in, if not then I'll head to bed.” He sees Galen’s anxious posture. “I'm not going to rape you.” He says bluntly, then as he sees the denial on Galen’s face, “or use you, or have sex with you. Or whatever they called it on Eadu. And not because they gave you the clap,” he hurries on after seeing the shadow of shame pass over Galen’s face. “But because I like any partner I have to be willing and want what we do as much as I do.” He watches Galen fidget. “If you want some non sexual company because you want some human interaction then I'd be happy to provide. Like last night. I can sleep next to you if you're nervous or you think it might help. Or leave you be if you'd prefer. It's totally up to you. I'm not going to be upset either way, honestly.”

Galen pauses, worries at his bottom lip with his teeth, “can…. If..if you come in, it'll be like last night?” He asks, sounding almost childlike in his need for reassurance. “Just…” he makes a meaningless gesture.

“Just like last night.” Cassian reiterates. “I'll wake you if you have a nightmare and keep you company.”

He doesn't say anything as Galen pulls the door open, just follows him inside and let's Galen set the pace.

Galen climbs into bed, fully clothed apart from shoes and Galen makes a mental note to issue him with more clothes. That's probably not the reason Galen isn't getting into nightwear but it still needs doing. He follows Galen's example and kicks off his shoes and climbs into the bed making sure to stay in his side and not touch Galen unless the other initiates the contact.

 

The bed jostles and he wakes, only reflexes honed by years of fieldwork mean that he manages to prevent Galen from falling out of bed. “Whoops, easy there. You ok?”   
“Yes, Master.” Galen gasps, clearly not completely awake.

“It's Cassian, remember? Do you remember where you are? You're with us now, a member of the rebel alliance.” He strokes his thumb over Galen's hand and tries hard not to think about why the pulse under his fingers if racing. Instead tries to consider why Galen has slept through the night seemingly without nightmares, comfort from the human contact? Or training kicking in telling him not to disturb his abusers? 

“Yes, Cassian.” Galen murmurs, Cassian is relieved to notice that his muscles begin to unclench, his heart rate subsides a little, “I remember.” Galen affirms. “Should I.. do you want?” Galen makes a vague hand gesture, and Cassian looks at the hand a little confused.“My mouth? Should? I.. I could, can-”   
“No, no thank you.” Cassian cuts of the anxious stammering, sickness rising. He tugs the blanket up a little higher adding a barrier between them hoping to reassure.

“Do you need me to build weapons?” Galen asks looking down at the bedding. Tracing the printed design the meanders across the material with one fingertip. 

Cassian struggles to follow the meandering path of the conversation. No,” he says, his voice gentle and he tugs gently at Galen's wrist to get him to look up. “Galen?” Cassian asks when they are more or less looking each other in the eye. “ Are you alright?”

“Yes?” He whispers, then blurts, “no, Master. Cassian, sorry, sorry.”   
“S’alright. You had to call people that for a long time didn't you? Does it make you feel safe?” He watches chest aching with emotion as Galen clearly doesn't recognise the idea of safety anymore. Hardly surprising, but nonetheless sad.

“We don't need you to build weapons for us, we might need you to answer some questions but you can always say no. It's up to you. You're not our slave, Galen.” he states as plainly as he can determined to say it until Galen believes him.   
Shuddering, Galen clenches the blankets between his fingers. Unbidden a tear slips down his face and the older man ducks his head further trying to hide it.

“What's wrong?” he asks gently.

“I-” Galen starts the falters, his body shudders and for a moment he seems to be gathering his thoughts. Then he leans forward and kisses Cassian.

Cassian kisses back, mouth opening, one hand coming up to tangle in the hair at the base of Galen's head, and for a long moment there is nothing but the press of lips on lips. Galen is a good kisser, he thinks before his mind catches up    
“What? No wait.” Cassian pushes at Galen's shoulders, gently maneuvers until Galen is sat back on his side of the bed.   
“Sorry.”   
“Why? Why did you kiss me? You don't want..? What's going on? Can you explain it to me?” Cassian asks, wanting to ensure that Galen understands that he is not a sex slave here.   
“I just-” he swallows. “I just, I wanted you to keep me, I don't want to go back. So I wanted to please you.”   
“And you though that would be through, well, uh, through sex?” Cassian asks with a sinking heart, guilt surfacing.

“I’ve not got anything else.”  Galen whispers, a flush appearing on his neck and ears and Cassian feels such rage at the Empire for breaking Galen so thoroughly that he clearly believes his own words.

“It's not like that, it's not.” Cassian sighs and runs a hand through his hair, “you've done a lot for the alliance, you set up their weapon to? What self destruct?”   
“No, it can be destroyed. It was designed to be indestructible but there is a way.”   
“A way that you put there?”   
“Yes.”   
“And it took you years? And if they had found out they would have- well they would have been pretty angry, I suppose.”   
Galen gulps, the mere thought has the hairs on his arms rising, his flesh goose pimpling in his fear. “They would have been very angry,” he confirms quietly.   
“So, the way I see it, is you've done your part for the alliance and the least we can do now is look after you.”

He can tell that Galen disagrees with his assessment, but reminds himself strongly to take baby steps, the alliance wasn't formed in a day, and Galen’s recovery will be an ongoing process.

“Ok, so none of that.” Cassian says gently, “Kas said to not do that anyway didn't he, not until your better. And even then it should be because you want to, not because you're trying to please me. Or anyone else for that matter. If anyone tries anything with you, tell me ok?”   
“Yes, sir. How am I to be punished?” Galen asks so mildly that Cassian is almost lulled into not noticing.   
“What?”   
At the sharp tone Galen jumps, Cassian grabs his wrist again,  starting up the same gentle caress across the wrist bones with his thumb in an effort to soothe Galen.

“I tried to kiss you even after Kas told me I wasn't to, and I slept under the bed without asking and-” Galen says, completely out of left field.   
“Woah.” Cassian holds up a hand to stem the flow of words, “firstly you can sleep wherever you like, well in your room or the common areas, ask before you climb into someone else's bed. Secondly, I think you're a bit confused about what's happening here, is that right? We haven't been clear with you. It's hard we haven't ever had someone who has been treated like this so I don't know how to help you. I don't want to order you around, you're free, but at the same time I don't want you to feel abandoned. Let's take this slowly, no kissing, me or anyone else. At least until you're settled. Let's get up and dressed, then let's have a chat about expectations, yours and ours, alright. Then you know what's happening and we can try to help you better? Sound good?”   
“Yes.”

“Good. OK, can you get showered and dressed? There are clean clothes in the drawer there, second from the top. Pick anything to wear, then come down to the canteen. Can you remember the way? Good. Alright I'll be along in a few minutes. If you're there first grab the usual table, ok?”

At Galen’s nod, he gives the older man one last reassuring squeeze and heads back to his own room to shower and change, before heading off to the canteen. Bodhi and Kay have beaten him there and it's a relief to sit with his old friend for a few moments and enjoy the peace.

“How’s Galen?” Bodhi asks his face concerned.

“He's, well, to be perfectly honest, i think he's a little confused about what we expect from him and I’m not completely sure how to make him feel better.”

“It will take time,” Kay says, and there is a world of understanding in his voice that's makes Cassian feel both guilty and glad to have him.

“Am i pushing too hard?”

“A little, it is unhelpful to put expectations on another person’s recovery time or to dictate, even to yourself, how someone should react. Galen is making a quicker recovery than could be expected given the circumstances if he recovers further than good, if not then we shall have to make allowances to enable him to live as independently as is possible.”

Besides his Bodhi nods and Cassian murmurs his agreement despite feeling a little chill or concern.

“Do you think that Galen won't recovery any further?”

“No,” Kay replies, “I think he will but i don't think it is fair to place any expectations on his shoulders while he does so.”

“Galen?” Bodhi interrupts suddenly and Cassian turns slightly and sees Galen walking towards their table, he is clearly in a state of panic and barely holding it together. As he reaches the table his drops down onto his knees with a bang that makes Cassian wince at the though of the bruises on his knees.

“Are you alright?” Bodhi asks, his face is concerned and at the words Galen twitches and blinks as though he has just woken up.

“I forgot where I was,” Galen mumbles, his hands shaking and his chest hitching.

“You're shaking.” Bodhi says his whole face is going pale and he looks terrified, but he reaches out and touches Galen, stroking down his spine in a manner that Cassian can tell is a move that he has done many times. He forgets that Galen and Bodhi had been together on Eadu for months and that Galen trusts Bodhi about as much as he trusts any of them. He feels a small slither of jealousy at the realisation.

Bodhi slides out of his seat and sits next to Galen on the floor, “what upset you?” he asks gently.

“I was showering..It's different from Eadu,” the reply is mumbled and doesn't make a great deal of sense, Cassian tries to get a good look at Bodhi to see if the reply means something more to him than it does to them. There doesn't seem to be much illumination on Bodhi’s face either, in an instant he tries to work out precisely what might have been upsetting Galen but then shuts off the train of though to deal with the situation he has to hand,

“And that upset you?” Bodhi asks bewildered. “Because it was different? Did you prefer it on Eadu?” he sounds plaintive.

“No.” Galen swallows and closes his eyes, “I’m sorry,” he adds and his voice is tight and it causes Cassian to feel his own chest constrict in sympathy. “I didn't want to disturb you, I'm.. I'll do better..”“You don't have to,” Bodhi tells him, “you're doing fine. It's normal to be upset. Everything has changed for you very quickly and we never even asked you if you wanted to come with us. We just took you from your home even though you'd asked me not to-”

Bodhi swears violently in another language and Cassian can see Galen's chest heaving as he panics. 

“Galen?” he says, “try to breathe, just breathe, you’re alright.” He can tell that the words aren't going to cut it and lifts Galen bodily into the nearest chair, pressing the older man's head down between his knees when Galen sways dangerously. Bodhi hovers nearby gently rubbing at Galen’s back, as though trying to soothe a baby. For a few long moments they just stand there holding Galen, Baze appears in the doorway clearly expecting dinner. He begins to usher away onlookers as he notices the situation.

As Galen’s breathing begins to slow, he asks, “Better?” He finds himself nodding as he says it willing it to be true.

“When?” Galen replies nonsensically.

Crouching down, trying to appear a less threatening sight, wanting to put Galen at ease, he asks, “When what?”

“When are you going…” Galen’s voice cracks and it takes him a moment to get back under control enough to talk. While he waits Cassian vibrates with tension wanting to know, to understand, but aware that trying to prompt Galen will result in more anxiety rather than less. “To get.. Rid of me?” Galen finishes, and the despairing dread in his eyes cuts deeply and he can tell by the look of absolute horror in Bodhi’s eyes that younger man feels the same way.

“No,” he starts, just as Bodhi jumps in with a blurted, “You're not.”

“We-” he tries to continue at the same time as Bodhi also tries to state denials.

“You’re not going anywhere, unless you want to,” he says, not even addressing the notion that Galen might think they are planning to have him killed.

“That was my fault, I didn't mean for you to think that, Galen. I was trying to tell you you've come a long way in a short space of time and that you're not bothering us when you get upset.” Bodhi croaks, his voice is shaking and reedy from the emotion that he's trying to keep in check. 

“You're not bothering us at all.” Cassian states firmly, internally making a note to talk to Bodhi later, give him an opportunity to unburden himself. He turns his attention back to Galen and notices the older man is staring at them, obviously trying to judge the sincerity of their words. He keeps his face as open and honest as he can while inwardly wincing at how obvious the emotions are on Galen’s face. Hating how easy it must have been for his captors to notice his fear or distress and use these against him. Feels sick simply considering how often they would have done just that.

After a pause, where he can all but see the gears turning in Galen’s mind, Galen finds the bravery to pipe up, “But there are limits.”

“Yes, yes you do.” Cassian interrupts as Bodhi takes his hand of his back and steps away.

“No, no,” Galen tells them, he looks totally shocked, and Cassian wonders if he'd been mistaken. “No, you have limits, you're young and you're babysitting an old man, you've got your limits-”

“No, it's not… it's .. I - We care about you, we want t..” Bodhi stammers.

“Care,” Galen repeats the word, looking dazed, like he's never heard it before and cannot fathom it's meaning.

“Yes,” Cassian affirms, “care we care about you, I know that it's too soon for you to take this on faith, but can you give us a chance to prove it.”

There is a split second, just a beat, before Galen nods.

Cassian feels the smile break out over his face both at Galen’s words and at the relief. They survived his panic attack without having to call for the medbay.

“Come on,” Bodhi says, “let's see if we can get some food.”

“I'll find the others,” Kay replies from where he'd been sitting completely still.

It's a relief when Galen manages to keep this meal down, he really is dangerously thin. His panic attack seems to have completely wiped out any strength he’d regained from a few days rest and he is all but asleep on his feet on the walk from the canteen to the office where they are all compiling reports of the intel they have gathered from the mission.

Baze drags a futon he's managed to acquire from the force only knows where and urges Galen onto, before dropping a coat over the man’s thin frame when he's fallen asleep. Cassian looks at his face, brow creased anxiously even in sleep and feels real grief for the man. Grief over how much he must have suffered over the years and how frequently any panic he'd felt must have been met with violence rather than understanding.

“Would they have hurt him for panicking like that?” he whispers to Bodhi, leaning in so he can murmur directly into his ear.

Bodhi sighs, “Not really,by the time I’d gotten there, it was mainly the collar to be honest.” He rubs a hand over his face. “He didn't really seem all that upset about thinks, he just used to stand there no matter what they did. If they did punish him it was because they wanted to or because he'd misunderstood what they wanted,” he considers, “or physically couldn't do it.” he grimaces at a memory, “rather than because he was freaking out. Like i said, he didn't really do that. Mostly he seemed numb.”

“Good survival tactic.” Baze mutters.

“The body does what it must to survive,” Chirrut agrees somberly.

Wishing that he'd never brought up the conversation, Cassian attempts to return his thoughts to the after action mission report he's been attempting to complete for three days now. But, like every time he's tried before, he's preoccupied by thoughts of the petty cruelty that living things are able to inflict on each other.

The thoughts of it haunt him all day on and off, but it's not until the early hours of the morning, Galen’s screams of terror ring through the corridor and he goes to wake him, to be with him in the night, that he dares to ask about it.

“Do you remember?” he whispers, “being free? Before the Empire?” he clarifies. He has been considering it all day, whether Galen remembers his daughter, he's never asked about her, or if he has any other family.

“Yes.” Galen breathes the admission into the dimness between them, “I just no longer know how to understand those memories.” 

Cassian turns on his side to look at Galen in the half light, “Oh,” he feels the weight of his own inadequacy in the face of another’s torment in a way he never has before. “Oh, Galen. I’m so sorry.”

 

Cassian steps out into the sunshine, he hates riding in the tiny tinpot shuttles, give him a proper ship any day of the week, if it looks as though it's a child’s toy he can't feel safe until he's stepped back onto solid ground. Ahead of him Galen stands, awkwardly, his hands clenching and unclenching nervously. Stepping up beside him, Cassian offers him a friendly squeeze, and hears Galen follow along as he steps ahead towards the Yavin 4 base.

At the checkpoint he slips ahead to talk to the guards, he desperately hopes that Crifred or Luclero are on duty. Both of those men are old friends and he can rely on them to let him vouch for Galen personally. Or at least let Galen watch them search him first so he knows what’s going on. He can't imagine that Galen will take to a surprise searching by armed guards with anything close to calm practicality.

To his relief, he sees Luclero leaning against the wall of the little hut he man's. “Hey.” he calls and sees Luclero’s weather beaten face crinkle into a welcoming smile.

“Cassian, good to see you back in one piece, boy.”

“I'm glad you’re here, I've brought back some new recruits. Well some recruits, a prisoner and a patient. It's the patient i want you to be most wary of, he was a captive of the Empire and he's in rough shape. He was tortured and abused. When you check him in can you-”

“I hate to interrupt, but where is your mystery friend? Where are any of them?”

Looking around Cassian notices that everyone has disappeared. “Kriff.” Turning on his heel, he goes in the direction he saw them last, and is more relieved than he can ever remember being when he sees a flash of movement that draws his eyes.

He half jogs over, not wanting to startle Galen but wanting to find him as soon as possible, but is brought up short by the bundle that the man has in his arms. It's a little brown dog, there is blood dripping from it, he can tell from the serenity on Chirrut’s face that it's not life threatening and he can tell by the look of mute pleading on Galen’s that they now have a dog.  _ Cool, a team dog.  _

He manages to get them through the check point quite easily, Galen is so fixated on his new dog that he barely pays attention to the pat down he is given by the guards. The dog is taken by one of the med bay staff, reluctantly, only after he glares and calls in some of the favours he's earned over the years. They get assigned rooms and he's not best pleased to find that Galen’s is much further from his than they had been back on the temporary base.

The first night is a complete disaster. He's too far away from Galen’s room to hear him if he wakes up and he misses Galen’s nightmare when it occurs. He hears about it when he hears the commotion in the hallway and opens his door to see three armed guards running down the corridor. He's sixth sense for trouble flares up and he sprints after them still in his workout pants with no shoes on. He follows them to outside Galen’s room where Baze is standing dressed only in his underwear with his arms folded over his beefy chest. Galen is quiet, suspiciously quiet.

“He's frightened.” he hears Chirrut saying deceptively gently and winces on behalf of whoever is irritating him.

“What's going on?” he asks.

“Captain Andor!” the closest guard cries with obvious relief. “It's Erso.” the young man's voice drops to a whisper. “The traitor.”

“No.” Cassian snaps, “he is not a traitor.”

He ferocity stops the young guard in his tracks and the expression on his face causes all of the guards present to falter back a step.

“I thought I’d made that quite clear.” he continues. “Now, what has happened?”

“Sir,” one of the other guards starts, “we heard screaming and went in to find the trait- erm, I mean, that is, Erso, he was trying to hide from us.”

Cassian reminds himself that it's counterproductive to murder his colleagues. “Because,” he says slowly, “he was terrified, he's been tortured for years by the Empire's best and brightest and now you've just continued the trend.” Guilt blooms on the young faces in front of him and ordinarily he'd feel for them, he'd made the same mistake after all, but right now he doesn't have time to cater to their feelings. Pushing past them he heads into Galen’s room and finds Bodhi crouched on the floor trying to persuade Galen out from under the bed where he's hiding. Bodhi has tears on his face and Chirrut is trying to divide his time between ensuring that Baze doesn't start a fight, comfort Bodhi and help talk Galen out.

“Hey,” Cassian says lamely. “Bodhi, why don't you go and make us all a hot drink? Take Baze and Chirrut with you? The guards will show you the way to the kitchen. Won't you?” he asks pointedly.

“Yes, sir.” he closest one,  _ Ianieder? Matysrs?  _ his sleep deprived name simply can't dredge the information out _ ,  _  says.

As they all troop out he lowers himself to the floor and seats himself close to the bed but not blocking Galen’s exit.

He leans back against the wall and leans his head back and begins to tell all the stories he can remember his parents telling him as child. He lost them when he was not quite six, so he doesn't know many and he's not sure he's getting them right, but it's soothing nonetheless and he makes sure to keep the rhythm of his voice soothing.

“Cassian?” 

The whisper of his name, brings him out of his thoughts, where he's trying to work out if the with eats the children or not in his retelling.

“Hey, Galen. Would you like to come out from under the bed? It's perfectly safe. I'm sorry those guys frightened you. Rebellion fighters, eh, an impulsive bunch. Like me they misjudged this, but they won't hurt you. I'll talk to them all tomorrow and make sure everybody knows.”

He helps Galen edge out from under the bed and manages to get him back into it, when he turns to leave Galen reaches out, doesn't quite grab a hold of his arm.

“Will you stay?” Galen asks, then clearly panics, “like you used to? I mean…. Just for sleep? Or I mean, if you-”

“I'll stay, just for sleep.” he reassures.

He pulls back the sheets and slides into bed, to his surprise Galen huddles closer. The other man's skin is cold and he's shivering. Very gently and ready to pull away at the slightest hint he tucks an arm around him, he expects tension or protest. Instead Galen melts into the touch like he's been waiting for it his entire life. Hoping that this is a comfort, rather than simply a reflex that has been trained into Galen, he holds Galen while they both drift off.

After the problems of the first night he doesn't bother to sleep in his own room, he asks Galen every night what he'd prefer, the first night a clearly nervous Galen keeps repeating that he ‘doesn't mind’. Unwilling to risk forcing his company on Galen if the older man doesn't want him, but even more unwilling to leave Galen and risk a rerun of the night before he sleeps in Bodhi’s room. As it's straight across the hall from Galen, he wakes at the first noise and is able to dive across the corridor before Galen has even woken Bodhi never mind anyone else. Just as the night before Galen edges closer and close until they are plastered together and relaxes as Cassian holds him tight.

For almost a month, the odd homeostasis continues and they all carry on, at first Galen seems to improve, his dog and the warm weather seem to prove therapeutic and while he still struggles with the guards and any new people he doesn't know he seems to settle. However, after a couple of weeks, Galen seems to backslide, he seems more nervous and almost clingy to them, he doesn't seem to want to go anywhere without them. Concerned Cassian approaches Kas, seeking advice and reassurance. Kas offers a sympathetic shoulder and prescribes more of the same, reminding Cassian that any recovery is never smooth and continually simple improvement. 

“Relapses occur even in patients who have simple colds, Cassian. It's not too surprising that your Galen has some minor setbacks as he recovers. Especially after he's had an upheaval and it could be simply that he has learned that it is now safe to demand these human comforts, without fear of punishment.”

He agrees with the assessment but still worries, he can't help wondering if he's pushing too hard or if he's missing something. It's so hard when you have no idea what someone’s ‘normal’ temperament should be. It's a relief when Galen agrees to return to work, not because he needs to or because Cassian wants him to do so, but because it puts Galen in contact with other people, and gives him a  routine. It seems to help too, the first night he appears in the canteen after having spent hours in the archives updating and correcting their data. When they are all sitting together eating a meal, it's the first time that he sees Galen looking normal, the older man looks a bit tired, but he looks satisfied as though he has done a hard days work and achieved something. The normality suits him.

A few days later, Galen returns to their now shared quarters much later than expected.

“Are you alright?” he asks, trying not to show too much concern in Galen mistakes it for censorship over his lateness, the older man is well within his rights to stay out late and he doesn't need to update Cassian with his every move. But he had been very consistent at informing them of where he was going and how long he would be. It's a change but perhaps not a negative one.

“I had to do some research.” Galen replies and it's a bit too quick a bit too forceful.

Uncertain Cassian rolls over to make space for Galen in their bed and says, “don't work too hard.” he resolves to keep an eye on the situation he can't tell if Galen is lying because he feels guilty about having time to himself or if something else is going on. He wants to ask but it's a fine line between making Galen feel supported and smothering him.

When he wakes up in the morning, Galen has already left. He searches the base and can't find him, but the dog is missing too so he assumes that Galen is out with his pet, the fresh air and space are things that he'd been denied for years so Cassian heads off to the days meetings. 

“Glad you could join us, Cassian.” Draven says his voice dry but with the undercurrent of fondness that has been there for Cassian since he was just a child. Lost and newly orphaned.

“Yeah,” he grins, “I was slow getting started this morning, but better late than never.” He slides into his place between a couple of old friends and takes stock of the room, a few new faces and one- no two missing ones.

“Where’s Notrub?” he whispers.

“He’s off on a milk run.” Tobilian whispers back.

Draven clears his throat loudly and they lapse into silence. “Right, now everyone is here, allow me to talk you through the next few days, the Death Star needs to be destroyed, i'm sure we can all agree on that. Cassian i need you and your team to lead a mission to some rebel’s, the Skywalker boy, to help pass on the intel we have gathered. It’ll just be you, the pilot, the girl and the couple. Erso will remain here.”

“With respect, sir, Galen knows the most about the project, it makes sense to take him.”

“In an idea world,” Draven says, “yes, but Galen is still under the care of the medical team here, id rather not disrupt that, and he can help with the intel here. We still have Krennic in our cells and I am hopeful that Galen will prove invaluable in helping to obtain truthful information from him. And if Krennic does lie to us it'll be quicker to check if Galen can spot it if he's on base than if he's with you. All the after mission reports are completed and Galen has given a complete copy of the plans, including the vital target port so his presence will be better served here. You will take the girl and the others who saw his message as proof of our good faith in his intelligence.”

Cassian goes to protest but Draven stops him with a raised hand.

“Cassian, not everyone feels comfortable with a man who spent so long in the empire's grasp.” He holds up his hand again to stem the protests that Cassian can feel bubbling in his throat, with difficulty Cassian swallows them back and gestures for his leader to continue. “There is some talk, nasty vicious rumours, that Galen is a sleeper agent or a double Agent, that he's working the situation to his advantage. We all know different and I'll personally vouch for his care while you're gone. You needn't worry, Cassian, I'll ensure that he gets everything he deserves.”

The meeting drags on and flight times are laid out, Cassian feels a prick of unease at the suddenness of his departure.

“So soon?” he asks. 

“The sooner the better, i'm afraid. Every day the death star is allowed to exist the greater the chance of it's vulnerability being discovered, and if it is then the fate of millions will be on our hands. It’ll be a very quick mission, in and out.” Draven smiles, sympathetically. “You'll be back before you know it, a day maybe two, three at the absolute outside.”

The next morning he rolls over and sees that Galen is already awake, “morning.”

“Morning,” Galen mutters, he is clearly agitated.

“You slept poorly last night,” Cassian observes hesitantly, “did you have nightmares?” he suspects that this is the reasoning for Galen’s clear unease, no doubt coupled with their impending departure.

Galen shrugs in response. He is avoiding eye contact and the difference in him makes Cassian’s throat constrict with worry. “Want to talk about it?” he asks, his voice a little strained. There is a long pause where he thinks that Galen isn't going to speak.

“Just-” Galen shrugs and waves a hand vaguely. “I was just unsettled.” 

“New place.” Cassian agrees, he can't help but feel that that is not all there is too it. “Well, I’ll try to see if we can't put off for a few days, but Draven needs this intel so I suspect that we will all be shipping out today. Will that bother you?”

“You're going? Where?” Galen tenses beside him and Cassian watches as his hands twist into the bedding.

“Just back to one of the other bases to meet with another group who have been further out for a few months. Draven wants us to update each other on all intel. Normally he goes himself but what with everything that's been happening around here,” Cassian waves encompassing Galen and the rest of the room, “well, he wants to stay here and go through all the data you brought and everything we've got from Krennic.”

“It’s safe?”

“For you, ye-”

“No, for you.”

“Safe as a spy ever is.” Cassian grins, but the smile drops off his face when he notices the tension that Galen is radiating in waves. “Yeah, Galen, I'll be back before you know it. We’re all going. Well, except you, I'm afraid. Draven won't hear about it until you've been signed off from medical.”

Galen clenches his fingers in the bedspread, and Cassian reaches over and prises his fingers away, wraps his own hand around Galen’s and squeezes.

“Two days, maybe three, then we’ll be back. Jyn too, perhaps when she gets back you’d like to talk to her? I know you're nervous but she wants to see you, just to know you're alright. Or at least to see you with her own eyes. The last time she saw you it looked like you were going to bleed out on the floor.”

Galen nods a bit glumly, Cassian knows he's anxious about such a meeting, but it cannot be postponed forever.

Packing his gear doesn't take long he's had a ready bag since he'd been about 12, he makes sure he has everything he's likely to need, then ensures that Kay is mission ready before heading out to the hangars. As he approaches he sees Galen clearly having said his goodbyes to the others and about to head back to the base.

“Galen.” he calls, wanting to make his own farewells. He hadn't lied and this is a very safe mission but he can't help but shake the feeling that something is going to go wrong.“Galen, I'm glad I caught you.” Cassian wraps Galen into a warm hug, others he holds it a little longer than is perhaps completely normal but Galen doesn't move to shake him off so he lingers, buries his face in Galen's shoulder, then steps away while still holding onto his biceps. “I'm glad I got to say goodbye. We won't be gone long, just a day or two.”

“I know.” Galen says, and there is a knot of anxiety in his voice, so Cassian hurries to reassure him despite his own doubts.

“Good, I'll see you in a couple of days, ok? Don't forget you've got a Med Bay visit the day after tomorrow. If you need anything go down to see Schmit, technically he's in accounts but he can sort you out with anything, extra food, clothes, messages. You name it, he's your man. Got it? OK, good, I have to go. Are you sure you're going to be ok?” Galen nods again and as the pilot makes a ‘let's go gesture’ Cassian forces himself to give Galen a reassuring smile.“OK, well, I’ll go. I'll see you soon.” He squeezes Galen’s arm and heads up the ramp. “Yeah, yeah.” he tells the pilot, not Bodhi, which is a shame he'd become used to his flying style, “I'm here, aren't I?”

The flight is long and the shutte cramped, like every pilot ever, Bodhi makes a terrible passenger and Cassian finds it easier to tune out his grumbled complaints and play cards with Baze, he's learned the hard way that playing with Chirrut or Jyn leads to the game dissolving quickly into a round of who is the best at cheating.

When they finally land, he has played every game he knows at least once and he's is more than ready to get off the shuttle. They are met by a young man with longish hair and a roguish grin.

“Hi, how was the trip?”

“We made it,” Cassian says, “it was a long trip though.”

“Yeah,” the man says, “Han,” he adds holding out a hand.

“Cassian.”

“Yeah, I spoke to your guy, what was it, Dravin?”

“Draven,” he corrects.

Han nods, accepting the correction and leads them away.

The rest of the day is spent in briefings, he wants to get this done as quickly as possible and he can feel the tension of the other rebels.

It's late the following day when the news comes through of the deaths stars destruction and the whole room bursts out into cheers. He's hugged by a bunch of people that he's never even met, their faces alive with hope and joy. A beautiful young woman, throws her arms around him, there are tears streaming down her cheeks and he wants to comfort her but she pulls away and goes to hug Han.

“Come on,” Bodhi appears at his side. “Let's get out of here.”

“Let's go home,” he agrees, the crowds of jubilant revellers makes him acutely aware of their missing teammate “Let's go home,” he repeats.

He sleeps the whole ride home, relaxed now that the mission is over, his worries were unfounded and they are heading home in one piece he'll be back to Galen in only a few hours.

“Cassian! Cassian, wake up. CASSIAN!” 

He is woken by a violent shake and his name being shrieked at him in high tones. Years of training have taught him to wake up alert and ready. “What?” he demands.

“Dad,” Jyn gasps, and for a moment Cassian is confused and awkward.

“Wha-”

“He's missing, no one knows where he's gone.”


End file.
